


J is just a reversed capital L

by gurajiorasu



Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-05
Updated: 2016-10-05
Packaged: 2018-08-19 17:50:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8219776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gurajiorasu/pseuds/gurajiorasu
Summary: Jun does the most stupid thing in the world in his attempt to get an excuse to keep contacting his ex, which is swapping their phones right before he boards the plane.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written for 2016's Arashi Exchange

### 1

  
Jun enters the cafe and politely refuses the waitress who is going to escort him inside. He scans the entire space with his eyes, trying to recognize the one he has invited to this place. He checks his watch—afraid that he might be too early—and then reaches for his phone in his pocket, intending to make a call. His movement stops midway, however, for a man suddenly stands up and waves at him.

“MatsuJun!” the man shouts loud enough that a few guests look up at him. “Over here!”

Jun’s face lights up and he makes his way to the man. “Aiba Masaki,” he spells the man’s name with a hint of wonder while pulling Aiba to a friendly hug, “It’s been what? 5 years? 6?”

“Four, actually,” Aiba corrects with a bubbly chuckle. He pulls away from Jun’s grip and steps aside to reveal another man who is already vacating the table.

Jun swears his heart does a backflip inside his ribcage. There, right in front of him, Ninomiya Kazunari is rising from his seat, smiling at him with an expectant smile that surely brings back memories. “Hey,” he mutters, eyes glinting in marvel.

“Hey,” Nino replies, looking down briefly with a wide smile before looking right at Jun again. His eyes are still as bright as Jun remembers.

They just stand right there like that, staring at each other as if the world is suddenly put to a halt just so they could take each other’s presence in. The world doesn’t seem to matter in that brief second until Aiba nudges them both and snickers meaningfully before gesturing them all to sit.

Jun sits across of Nino and Aiba sits to his left. To be completely honest, the position makes it easier for Jun to tune Aiba out and focuses on Nino and he is completely grateful about that. It’s not that he hates Aiba, really, but it is not every day that he has the chance to look at Ninomiya Kazunari in person—his former classmate in college, his best friend, his _ex-boyfriend_.

“So, what brings you here today?” Aiba asks while offering a plate of garlic bread to Jun.

Jun refuses the bread and answers, all while still eyeing Nino closely, “I had to do a job around here.”

“Oh. For an ad? Magazine?” Aiba takes the garlic bread himself and starts munching.

“Magazine,” Jun answers, checking Nino’s reaction. He smiles when Nino looks at least curious. “Next edition of AnAn.”

“The sex edition?” Aiba gasps, probably a little bit too loud.

Jun laughs, and Nino does too. Jun shakes his head and, for once, looks at Aiba. “I’m not that famous, you know that.”

“Oh, you will. I know you will,” Aiba waves his garlic bread in front of Jun’s face. “Right, Nino?”

Nino laughs and sips his coffee. He looks at Jun, straight to his eyes, and then answers, “Yeah. But I don’t think he’s after that kind of photo shoots.”

Jun feels a surge of happiness. “You know me too well,” he says. Then, because he is not there just to talk about himself, he changes the topic and asks, “How about you guys? How’s life? What do you do now?”

“I run a restaurant—”

“Your family’s?” Jun asks.

Aiba smiles, wide and bright. “Yes. You remember that? I took over the restaurant a year ago. Meanwhile, this guy works in a local television station.”

“Oh, really?” Jun fakes a surprise. Of course he has heard about it before. He doesn’t stalk Nino or anything, but when he hears something about Nino, he remembers. Everything about Nino matters. It still does, even after all the years they’ve spent apart.

“One day, when you act on your first movie, I might be the director,” Nino says with a confident smile—almost cheeky, but delightful nonetheless. “I’m still just an assistant director now, though. But I’m getting there.”

Jun wants to point out that he’s glad Nino is still on the track of chasing his lifelong dream, but he’s not sure if it will come out not creepy. He does a small bow instead, chanting a _‘yoroshiku onegaishimasu’_ that is followed by everyone’s laughter.

They then proceed to talk about life and so on over food that eventually comes to their table. Aiba does a great job of keeping the conversation alive, more so than what it would have been had it been only the two of them. The conversation gets more natural as the time goes and when they finish their lunch, Jun has enough proof that Nino has never changed.

Nino is still the same man he fell in love with years ago. He is still quick-witted, sharp-tongued, and considerate in all levels that there are. He still amuses Jun. He is still the best and, in the same time, the worst friend that Aiba could have. He is still charming in the oddest way that Jun will never be able to explain how.

Jun is glad that he contacted Aiba. Everything went better than what he expected. He actually thought meeting Nino would be, at least, difficult and somewhat awkward, but now he finds himself dreading the moment he has to say goodbye. He likes to think that he has successfully moved on with his life after that one afternoon when they decided that being boyfriends is not for them, but being in front of Nino surely brings back feelings that he doesn’t know he has been missing.

Too bad Jun has a plane to catch.

“Oh crap, I need to run,” Jun says as he realizes that he has stayed an hour more than he anticipated. “My flight is in 45 minutes.”

Aiba’s eyes widen, “What?! Why didn’t you tell us? You’re going to be late, you dumb!”

Jun gets up and puts down an amount of money that he hopes enough to cover their meals. “It’s because you started to talk about college!” Jun defends, grinning. His hands grab around for his belongings in his pocket. He almost forgets his phone that he put on the table, but fortunately he remembers.

Aiba rolls his eyes, “The next time you come, make sure you have enough time in hand. I’ll bring you to my restaurant.”

Jun beams even though he knows ‘next time’ might be as far away as ‘never’. He turns to say something to Nino too, but Nino is standing up from his seat.

“I’ll get you to the airport,” Nino says, taking his car key from his pocket and showing it to Jun.

Jun stares. He is not sure what to react. He was ready to bid Nino goodbye, it’s kind of taking him aback that suddenly Nino offers to give him a lift.

Nino laughs. “What? I drive now. I swear I got my license fair and square.” He pats Aiba on the shoulder and walks ahead towards the cafe’s entrance.

Jun decides that it would be just natural to go along with Nino. He spares Aiba a short wave and tails Nino. “You sure you didn’t do any trick? This is my life I’m putting on the line,” Jun says jokingly.

Nino turns around so fast that Jun almost bumps into him. He punches Jun’s shoulder while walking backward so that they will not stop moving. “You better have your will ready, just in case.”

Jun laughs, gripping Nino’s shoulder to turn him around once again, afraid that Nino will trip or bump into something. He nods to a waiter and exits the cafe after Nino, following the man to a black SUV.

“Make sure you write my name on your will, okay? Just a couple million yen will do,” Nino continues as he opens the passenger door and tidies some files that occupy the seat. He steps back so Jun can enter and closes the door for Jun before getting his way to the driver’s seat.

“Oh, you won’t need all the money. I’ll take you to the grave, Ninomiya,” Jun jokes. He sees Nino plug his phone to the travel charger and notices that there’s another charger plugged in but unused. “Mind if I use that?” he asks.

“Nah,” Nino answers shortly while maneuvering the car out of the parking lot. “Just put it there, beside mine,” Nino says because Jun holds his phone awkwardly.

Jun notes that their phones are identical; same brand, same model, and without any accessories. It’s very Nino-like, though—the latest model which is kept pristine like how the factory delivers it. However, the car is definitely not Nino-like.

“Is this yours?” Jun blurts out. “The car, I mean.”

Nino steals a glance towards Jun. “What? Are you implying that I don’t look like someone who owns a car?”

“I am implying that the car doesn’t really look like your taste,” Jun counters. He takes a cat ornament from the dashboard and points it to Nino. “Like this. This doesn’t really look like what you’d put on your dashboard.”

Nino smirks. “Should I put a dog one instead?”

Jun waves. “No. You’d put nothing on your dashboard. Maybe a guitar miniature or a car freshener, but definitely not animal ornaments. Especially not a lot of them like this.”

Nino laughs. He snatches the cat ornament from Jun and put it back on the dashboard. “Don’t touch the cats, okay?”

“Hey, I was being nice to the cat!” Jun argues and laughs too.

Once their laughter fades away, Nino tells Jun the truth. “This is company’s car. I don’t own any, it’s—”

“Troublesome,” Jun completes Nino’s words.

Nino stares at Jun for as long as his responsibility as a driver allows him. An unbelieving smile adorns his face. Finally, he nods anyway. “Yeah, it’s troublesome.”

“Ah, you really haven’t changed,” Jun concludes out loud.

“Say that to yourself,” Nino replies, guffawing.

“Hm?”

“You hasn’t changed too,” Nino says.

“How so? I believe I did.” Jun sits up straighter, curious.

Nino shrugs and throws a sly look. “Some things have changed but you’re still the same,” he says. Seeing that Jun is nothing but confused, he simplifies, “It’s not a bad thing.”

Jun raises his eyebrow and Nino only replies him with another shrug. He laughs and shakes his head, mentally taking note that this aspect of Nino hasn’t changed too.

Nino turns the radio on and a song plays. He taps his fingers on the steering wheel and mouths the music rather than the lyric. Jun joins in, singing along with a faint voice. Nino looks at him and grins, making Jun ups his voice a bit.

They don’t talk anymore after that except for some directions and small comments on random things. It’s not awkward, but comfortable instead. It feels vaguely like they’re back in their university’s small, stuffy music studio, with Nino strumming his guitar and Jun reading Nino’s comic. There’s no guitar and there’s no comic, of course, but it still feels like that nonetheless—like they’ve time traveled back to when their world was still largely consisted of each other.

Nino surely drives smoothly, but he steps on the gas deep enough to keep Jun from being late. Not half an hour later, they are already inside the airport area. Nino drives towards the lobby, and the moment Jun opens his door, the announcement for his flight welcomes him.

“Oh shit, it’s the last call,” Jun groans. He knows he should be panicking and hurrying, but a part of him doesn’t want to do that. A part of him wants to stay and take another ride with Nino—to where, he doesn’t care. The announcement is heard again and he doesn’t have any other option than to get out of the car and slam the door behind him. Nino rolls down the window and Jun gives him a quick glance. “Thanks, Nino!” he shouts and starts to run.

Three steps after, Jun turns back. His mind that is still so full of Nino manages to remember the one thing he almost forgot. “My phone!” he gasps. He can see his phone and Nino’s from the window, still attached to the cables. Reaching through the still-opened window, he grabs the phone and waves it, “Almost forgot this!”

Nino laughs, “Really, you.” He eyes Jun as he runs into the crowd. “Have a safe flight!” he shouts.

Jun doesn’t stop running but he turns to flash Nino a smile and a thumb up. “Bye,” he mouths. Then he looks forward, leaving Nino who is definitely driving away, feeling the weight of the phone in his hand.  
   


### 2

  
Jun stares at the phone in his hand on his way back home from the airport. He can not believe he did what he did, which is deliberately taking Nino’s phone instead of his in his rush to catch his flight. He is not even sure what he was thinking when he did it. In that split second in which he reached through Nino’s car window, he swears his brain was short-circuited and malfunctioning. Somehow, in the middle of adrenaline rush and panic, he saw it as a chance to keep in contact with Nino. He saw it as an option, so he took it. As simple as that.

Jun has been restless since the moment he passed the boarding gate. Repeatedly, he wanted to go back and apologize to Nino for the mistake he has made, but a stewardess was always behind him, urging him to board the plane already because he’s the last passenger who hasn’t boarded yet. His conscience was disturbed all along the one hour flight, and when he landed safely in Tokyo, the first thing he did was to turn Nino’s phone on to send him his sincerest apology. But Nino’s phone was, of course, locked.

Jun stares at the lock screen, cursing himself internally for acting out of impulse. He thought of using a payphone but, as the time goes by, he realizes that he doesn’t know what to say to Nino. An apology is a sure thing, but Jun is not exactly ready to explain. He thinks about going along with it, saying that he didn’t realize that it’s Nino’s phone instead of his until it’s too late, but lying to Nino has never felt right to him.

Before Jun could compromise with himself on what he should say and do, the phone buzzes. His own number flashes on the screen, along with a single letter ‘J’.

So Nino still has his number.

“Hello,” Jun answers.

“Finally!” Nino shouts from the other line. “You got the wrong phone, J.”

“Yeah,” Jun says. “Listen, Nino, I’m really sorry about this. I—”

Nino’s long exhale of breath cut Jun’s words. “I can’t believe you, really.”

“I’m sorry,” Jun repeats because he still doesn’t know how to proceed.

“Yeah, yeah, it’s okay. What’s done is done anyway,” Nino says, not showing any interest in hearing Jun’s apology or explanation. He sounds a little bit upset, but otherwise not scrutinizing or blaming Jun. He then sighs and continues talking with calmer voice, “What should we do now?”

“I’ll go back there again, okay?” Jun says without thinking further.

“Oh, you can do that?”

Actually, Jun is not really sure if he can do that. His manager has warned him not to make any appointment during this week, and it could only mean that his schedule is going to be crazy. He sighs, starting to feel defeated. “If you want to meet me at the airport so I can go back here again immediately, I think there will be no problem.”

“You want to fly here just to take your phone?” Nino sounds like he couldn’t believe what he just heard. “Just send me your address and I’ll send your phone through courier service. I’m so not going to let you burn your money like that.”

“Courier service?” Jun closes his eyes and rubbed his temple.

“I’ll send it with insured service, don’t worry. It will cost a fortune but it will arrive in a matter of hours and it is definitely cheaper than return tickets from Tokyo to here,” Nino says in one breath, sounding somewhat agitated because Jun is willing to fly to Osaka just to return the phones.

“That’s not the matter,” Jun sighs. “I just think that... At least I want to apologize to you in person,” Jun blurts out. He truly thinks that he needs to apologize directly to Nino about this but, if he’s about to be completely honest, there’s a bit of selfish motivation in it. He wants to meet Nino again. After all, that is what caused all of this in the first place.

Nino doesn’t immediately reply after that. When he starts to talk again, his tone has lost its heat. “Well, I... will have to go to Tokyo for work in a few days. I was thinking that maybe I’ll take my phone while I’m there.”

“Oh.” Jun gulps.

“Wait,” Nino suddenly says and taps the phone a few times, “There’s an incoming call from Takizawa Hideaki. What should I do?”

“Shit,” Jun curses because he forgot that he still has other things to mind aside of swapped phones and Nino. “That’s my manager. Could you answer it? But don’t tell him that I left my phone there because he’ll fry me. Just tell him that I’m in the bathroom or something.”

“What?”

“He will not ask. Just tell him that,” Jun assures. It’s either he doesn’t want to meddle with his private life or he simply just doesn’t care, but Jun’s manager has never asked if things like this happen.

“Okay, wait,” Nino says.

The waiting tone plays and Jun takes this chance to ask the driver to pull over. His apartment complex is already in sight anyway. He pays the fare and gets out from the cab. Walking briskly while listening to the silly tune, Jun tries to clear his mind. He tries to wrap his head around the current situation. He doesn’t have his phone and he definitely can not tell his manager about it. It might be the wisest to have his phone sent from Osaka through courier service like Nino has mentioned before, but Nino is coming in a few days anyway, it might be less troublesome for Nino to just wait for Nino to come.

However, will he survive without his phone?

The waiting tone stops and Nino’s voice comes in. “He really didn’t ask anything,” Nino says with an amused voice. “He says that he’ll pick you up in an hour for Soda photoshoot.”

“Oh, yeah,” Jun sighs. He totally forgot that he still has work that day. He paces up and gets inside his apartment building, climbing the stairs two steps at a time. Panting vaguely, he talks to Nino, “If you’re coming here, then we’ll just meet up when you’re here?”

“My schedule is still tentative, though. I’ll send yours through courier service first thing in the morning tomorrow. Just keep mine for now, I’ll take it when I’m there.”

“No,” Jun huffs, reaching his floor and getting inside his apartment unit. “I’ll take it when you’re here. Just... Can I use yours until then?”

“You sure you don’t want me to send yours?” Nino doubts.

“No, it’s okay as long as I can use yours in case I need to contact someone,” Jun says. He sounds sure, but actually he’s not really sure himself. He just doesn’t want to bother Nino more because of his one truly stupid and illogical act.

“Well, if that’s what you say,” Nino gives up. “You can use mine. It will be easier for me too if I can use yours.”

“Yeah, just use it.” Jun walks past a mirror and realizes how messed up his appearance is. It was truly a bad idea to take later flight instead of earlier one like his manager’s minding his schedule. But he got to meet Aiba and Nino because of it, so he’s not going to complain. “Okay, then. I need to get ready now before my manager picks me up. So, talk to you later?”

“Yeah,” Nino replies. He stops Jun from terminating the connection with a shout, “Oh, J!”

“Yes?”

“The passcode is 3698,” Nino informs.

“What?” Jun, who is already unbuttoning his shirt, doesn’t get it at once.

“That’s the passcode of my phone,” Nino elaborates. “It’s 3698,” he repeats. “Just—,” he pauses for a second, “—make a reversed capital L.”

“Ah. Okay. Reversed L. Okay,” Jun tries to remember it. “My passcode is—”

“0830, I got it,” Nino cuts, sounding a bit smug. “How do you think I call you, huh? You’re so predictable, J. You’re lucky it’s me who got your phone.”

There’s a short silence before Jun laughs a bit. A warm sensation washes his entire being. Nino figured out his passcode means that Nino remembers his birthday. Even after all this time.

“Okay,” Nino says with finality in his voice, “Don’t bust my bill.”

Jun laughs again. Louder this time. “Okay.”

They end the call just like that. Jun dashes to his bathroom to have a quick shower because he desperately needs it. While in the shower, Jun’s brain tries to digest everything that just happened and tells Jun that something is still amiss. Jun hasn’t mentioned why exactly that their phones ended up in the wrong hands. But, then again, Jun didn’t exactly lie to Nino. They just simply don’t talk about it, and Nino simply doesn’t ask.

Jun smiles. He decides that everything goes smoother than he expected, and he’s very glad about it. Nino is not angry with him and they are going to meet again in a matter of days. This is better than all the things that Jun has ever wished when it comes to Nino after they broke up. They are actually communicating and the awkwardness that Jun has been dreading since forever is proven to be just him being paranoid.

Jun gets out from the shower twenty minutes later, fresh and decidedly happy. He takes out his good clothes and wears it, doesn’t really care that he will have to change out of it anyway the moment he arrives at the set. He manages to fix himself a quick dinner and finish it right before his doorbell rings. He takes his bag and puts his wallet into it. Then, he takes Nino’s phone with him and goes out of his apartment, meeting his manager with a greeting.

Inside the car, Jun turns on the phone’s screen. With a swipe, he brings up the lock screen that has been undefeated since the first time he lay his hand on the phone. His thumb hovers at the buttons, and he keys in the number that Nino told him.

_3._

_6._

_9._

_8._

It unlocks.

For a reason he doesn’t want to point out, Jun grins.  
 

### 3

  
Jun doesn’t exactly like night photo shoots, but it’s always better than morning ones. During night photo shoots, he’s at least awake enough to follow the photographer’s instructions. However, night photo shoots always lead to meetups in bars that always lead to a massive hangover. Jun likes hanging out with his friends, but he is not exactly fond of the aftermath.

It never helps that Jun has a soft spot for his friends. Like tonight, when Ikuta Toma, a fellow model of Jun, calls Sakurai Sho, Jun’s partner for the photo shoot, and asks them both to come over to the bar they frequent to, Jun can not bring himself to refuse. He somehow ends up perching on the bar, swirling his glass of martini while watching Toma and a few other people from the same agency as them dance their heart out on the dance floor.

Jun swears he’s not going to go home drunk that night because he has to work the day after, but there’s nothing much that he could do in a bar aside from drinking. He hasn’t drunk enough to start dancing and he’s definitely not there to hit on some random strangers. As the last resort, he takes his phone out of his bag, intending to scroll through the news to see if there’s something interesting.

He tries to unlock the phone, but he fails. Then, he remembers that it’s Nino’s phone that he’s holding in his hand.

Jun smiles involuntarily. He puts down the glass of martini and inputs Nino’s passcode. As soon as it’s unlocked, the phone greets him with a few notifications. There are a few missed calls from his number. Other than that, Jun sees his own name on LINE’s notification and he opens it.

It turns out that Nino has added him through LINE application. Or, to be exact, Nino has added himself through LINE application using Jun’s account. Thinking about this already makes Jun chuckle. Their situation is ridiculous, to say the least.

Jun taps on his name and finds a few new messages.

Matsumoto: i can’t believe i’m adding myself  
Matsumoto: can you send me Tabe Mikako’s contact?

Jun doesn’t know who this Tabe Mikako is, but he supposes Nino has his contact on his phone so he should just send the contact details over. The next messages are timed way later than the first two messages.

Matsumoto: there’s a guy named Ikuta Toma that keeps calling you  
Matsumoto: i ignored him  
Matsumoto: then he sent you line message  
Matsumoto: (it’s not that i open it but you turned the pop up notification on so i accidentally read it)  
Matsumoto: he’s inviting you out, i suppose? Idk  
Matsumoto: did i just cock-block you by ignoring him?

Jun grins. Toma did complain about not being able to reach him earlier.

Nino: [Contact details of Tabe Mikako]  
Nino: No, no. You did right. Just ignore everything coming from him.  
Nino: He’ll find a way to reach me anyway.  
Nino: And you’re not cock-blocking anyone. He’s just a friend from the agency.

Surprisingly, minding that it’s already way past midnight, Nino replies immediately.

Matsumoto: thanks  
Matsumoto: good then  
Matsumoto: you also have some other notifications

Jun smiles. He vaguely thinks that Nino must be playing with his games.

Nino: Oh, you’re still awake.

Jun stops and considers what to do with those notifications before typing again.

Nino: Just ignore them for now.  
Nino: But if there’s anything from my manager, tell me immediately, okay?  
Nino: The name is Takizawa Hideaki.

Matsumoto: the night is still young [laughing emoji]  
Matsumoto: okay, then

Nino: How about your notifications?

Matsumoto: will check them through my laptop  
Matsumoto: just relay me my text messages if any

Nino: Okay.

“Girlfriend?” a voice startles Jun.

Jun looks up from the phone and finds Sho sitting next to him. Sho is one of the closest seniors he has in the agency. Jun used to admire Sho so much and Sho has always been somewhat fond of Jun. Everyone used to think that they will end up together in one way or another, and it’s not entirely wrong. They do end up together. In most of their jobs, that is. They get paired together a lot. Eighty percent of Jun’s job is practically getting shot with Sho next to him.

Jun chuckles and stealthily hides the phone screen from Sho’s sight. “Nope,” Jun answers.

“Boyfriend?” Sho tries again.

Jun sips his martini. He gives it a thought before finally deciding to just tell Sho the truth. “Ex,” he says. He makes sure his smile doesn’t waver while saying it.

Sho observes Jun’s expression for a few seconds. Then, he smiles. “Getting back with your ex?”

Jun shrugs. It sounds nice, to be honest. He likes how it sounds. But, the truth is, they’re talking only because Jun has taken Nino’s phone. If anything, Jun should be glad that Nino didn’t straight out curse him for doing something so ridiculous. It would be too greedy to hope too much out of something so stupid. “We’re just talking,” Jun says, “I had a job in Osaka earlier today, so I invited a friend out for a catch-up. He brought my ex and we... kinda... talk again. As friends.”

Sho nods but his face shows that he’s not buying it. “As friends. Yeah, of course.”

“It’s the truth!” Jun laughs.

Sho turns on his seat so he’s facing Jun. His elbow supports him on the table and he starts talking, “Okay, then. How about the other friend. The one that you invited in the first place. Do you exchange messages with him while grinning like a fool?”

Jun rolls his eyes while laughing. He downs his martini at once and orders another one, definitely avoiding to answer Sho.

“Do you even exchange messages with him?” Sho asks again. His grin is getting wider.

“Well...” Jun avoids looking at Sho’s eyes. He can not explain that everything is because he deliberately seized Nino’s phone and left his with Nino, of course.

“As friends, my ass!” Sho laughs. He turns to face his drink again, grinning triumphantly. “Why is this person an ex on the first place, anyway?”

Jun’s smile fades. That’s the one topic he still refuses to touch even after all these years. It’s not like they had a messy breakup—because they didn’t—but Jun prefers to not remember that time. There’s an unpleasant feeling that chokes him every time he remembers how they ended up apart. “We decided that we’re better off as friends,” Jun gives the answer that is true to some extent.

Sho notices the change of Jun’s mood. He looks to his drink and nods understandingly, downing the rest of his drink in one go. “And is it true?”

“Hm?” Jun turns to Sho.

“That you two are better off as friends. Is that true?” Sho asks. He gestures to the bartender to give him another round of his drink.

Jun doesn’t answer. He struggles to keep the small smile he has on his face. To be honest, after the breakup, they have never gone back to being friends. Jun avoided Nino, he remembers that clearly. Then, they drifted further apart due to their last year of college. Finally, they graduated and Jun moved to Tokyo.

However, if being friends is including the time before they became boyfriends, then it’s definitely better.

Sho inhales and then exhales deeply. He gets up, sliding his untouched drink towards Jun. He pats Jun’s shoulder and leaves Jun alone.

Jun laughs at himself pitifully and starts to regret his decision to contact Aiba. Everything has been working out perfectly. He has moved on with his life. He has dated a few other guys, even. He has forgotten Nino for the most part. But then, he just had to remember that both Aiba and Nino live in Osaka and now he can already feel the poisonous thing called hope grows inside of him.

Jun sighs. He drinks both glasses of liquors in one succession. He pockets the phone without looking at it again and walks down to the dance floor. He joins Toma and the rest of the group, letting the alcohol leads him.

That night, he doesn’t remember at what time he got home and how, but he does remember checking the phone to find a few messages from Nino, telling that his manager sent him messages to remind him about his schedule the next day. He can not read them properly because his vision is blurry and his head is spinning, but he manages to register the last two messages.

Matsumoto: night, J  
Matsumoto: rest well

Right then and there, with alcohol clouding his mind, Jun decides that he doesn’t care anymore. What happened in the past stays in the past. They live in the present and the present Jun doesn’t care if the past Jun thinks that they’re better off as friends.

Jun doesn’t care if hope is poisonous. He’s having it anyway.  
 

### 4

  
The very next day, Jun wakes up to a phone call. His head reacts badly to the ringing voice so he reaches for the phone as fast as he could in order to shut it up. In result, he moves too fast and ends up on the floor. He gets the phone, though, so he just answers it there.

“Yeah,” Jun croaks.

“Jun?” Nino sounds concerned, probably the result of hearing Jun’s miserable voice. “You okay?”

“Hangover,” Jun says while massaging his temple. He pulls his blanket from the bed and proceeds to make himself comfortable on the floor.

Nino sighs audibly. “You better not sent anything ridiculous to anyone with my phone while you’re drunk.”

“Hm,” Jun responds without really registering what Nino is saying.

“Wake up, J. Take aspirin or something and drink up. Your manager just called. He’ll pick you up in an hour,” Nino frets. “He really doesn’t ask a thing, though. Is that even normal?”

“He’s fine, he’s fine,” Jun assures. Nino’s voice in the morning, while Jun’s having a hangover, is definitely going to The Things Jun Doesn’t Like but Willing to Put Up With Because It’s Nino list. Jun is fully awake now, thanks to Nino’s voice that sometimes can be the most annoying thing ever when he wants it to. He stands up, goes to the kitchen, and drinks a glass of water. “Did he send my schedule?”

“Should be.”

Jun vaguely recalls that Nino messaged him about the schedule. “It should be in my email. Could you send it to me? Through LINE, maybe?”

“If you’re okay with me opening your inbox then, sure, I’ll send it to you. I mean, it’s your email, it’s a bit different than LINE,” Nino says, asking for Jun’s permission.

Jun doesn’t actually mind it. He trusts Nino, anyway. It’s Nino. Nino might not look like it, but he’d be the last person to do an inappropriate thing even when it comes down to it. “Yeah, just open it.”

“You sure?”

Somehow, Jun laughs. “Yes! Do I need to give you a written permit or something?”

Nino must be rolling his eyes, Jun can practically feel it. “I just don’t want to get sued,” Nino says. “Okay, then. I’ll send it to you.”

“Thanks.” Jun walks back to his bedroom, stretching his muscles and massaging his head. He curses the past Jun internally for drinking too much even though he has sworn not to go home drunk. He’s lucky Nino calls him. Because if Nino didn’t and he slept in, he would never hear the end of it from his manager. Thinking about this, Jun expresses his gratitude properly to Nino, “And thanks for waking me up.”

Nino hums, acknowledging, and says, “I gotta go now. Bye.”

Jun smiles at it and replies, “Bye.” He puts the phone down on the nightstand and searches for aspirin inside the drawer. He showers after taking the aspirin, and then brews a pot of coffee and makes some toasts. While waiting for his breakfast to be ready, Jun takes the phone and checks it. There are some LINE messages from Nino.

Matsumoto: i’ll just copy and paste your schedule here  
Matsumoto:  
10 AM - Meeting with GungHo  
1 PM - Interview with AnAn  
4 PM - Photoshoot for Meiji CM  
Matsumoto: gungho is pazudora’s producer, right?

Jun taps home and swipes through the applications that Nino has. He spots Puzzle & Dragons.

Nino: Yes.  
Nino: How exactly do we play it?  
Nino: They’re approaching us for their upcoming CM but I’ve never played it.

Matsumoto: no kidding  
Matsumoto: you don’t even have it on your phone  
Matsumoto: geez. and here i thought i’d have something to play on

Jun laughs. Compared to his phone, Nino’s phone has a lot of games. He even finds the Pokemon game that everyone has been talking about lately.

Nino: You can install it if you want to.  
Nino: I’m going to need it anyway.

Matsumoto: will do  
Matsumoto: [laughing emoji] it kinda feels like we’re getting too comfortable with this situation

Nino: Well, I like this phone.  
Nino: Apparently it has wake-up call service. [cheeky emoji]

Matsumoto: [unamused emoji]

The bell rings, signing that Jun’s manager is already there. Jun puts his cup of coffee in the sink, takes his bag, and goes out of his apartment. “Tackey,” he greets his manager while locking the door.

Tackey observes Jun for a while and then starts walking, heading to the car he parked outside. “I thought you had company,” he comments, definitely referring to Nino who has been answering Jun’s phone since yesterday.

Jun laughs discreetly behind Tackey. He doesn’t say anything about it, knowing that Tackey wouldn’t prod further if he keeps silent. They get into the car and Tackey drives them to GungHo’s office. While on the way, they discuss about work and also talk about random things. Tackey is Jun’s friend before he’s his manager, after all. They are more like brothers than work colleagues. The fact that Tackey doesn’t like to sniff around on Jun’s life doesn’t make him any less close with Jun.

They arrive at the building just in time. Tackey drops Jun off on the lobby and goes to park the car. There, Jun meets Sho and his manager, a small man named Ohno Satoshi. Jun has never realized it before, but Ohno slightly reminds him of Nino. Probably it’s because they have similar builds, but it also could be because Jun can not take Nino out of his head.

“I’m surprised you’re here,” Sho smirks. His eyes are covered with sunglasses, probably to cover the hint of hangover that appears in his eyes. “You were really out of it last night.”

“Right back at you, Sho-kun,” Jun responds.

Sho laughs, but his laughter fades out slowly when he sees Tackey approaching them. Tackey nods at him and he nods back.

“Sakurai-san,” Tackey greets. He then turns to Ohno and greets the manager as well, “Good morning, Ohno-san.”

“Morning,” Ohno beams, matching the smile that Tackey gives his way. The managers then lead the way inside the building while chatting among themselves, discussing about the details of the meeting they are about to attend.

They get inside a meeting room not so long after. Two men from the company greet them formally and the meeting is started right away. Right from the beginning, the managers and the company representatives have taken over the discussion. Meetings about upcoming contracts have always been like this. It is as if Jun and Sho are not there at all. The agency is pretty strict on this, insisting that they only want the best for their talents anyway. Five minutes in, Sho is still trying to pretend that he’s going to have a say in one way or another, but Jun feels the phone buzzes inside his pocket so he decides to take out the phone and unlocks it under the table.

There are new messages from Nino.

Matsumoto: there’s someone named ‘Don’t Answer’ calling you earlier  
Matsumoto: i didn’t answer because i’m good like that  
Matsumoto: [laughing emoji]

The next messages are timed around one hour later.

Matsumoto: god  
Matsumoto: Don’t Answer is still calling  
Matsumoto: 6 missed calls already!!!

And then, there are the most recent messages.

Matsumoto: OH MY GOD  
Matsumoto: I’M SO DONE, J

As Jun scrolls through it, an incoming call appears. The phone buzzes and it startles Jun, making him move suddenly and end up knocking the phone on the table. Everyone looks at him and he can tell that his face is turning red in an instant. “Sorry,” he whispers his apology along with an attempt of a bow.

Everyone ignores Jun and proceeds with the meeting, except for Sho. Sho eyes Jun with a smirk. If they are not in the middle of a meeting, Sho must have laughed his heart out.

Jun glares at Sho, but then stifles a laugh too. He then looks down again, typing a message for Nino since he rejected the call. Before he could send the message, though, the phone is already buzzing again. It caught everyone’s attention once more.

“You should pick it up, Matsumoto-san, it looks urgent,” a man from GungHo says.

Tackey visibly sighs, disapproving this happening.

Jun gets the phone away from everyone’s sight and turns the phone off with a press, sitting up straighter as he does so. “No, no. It’s nothing. Please, proceed,” he says with an apologetic smile.

Through the rest of the meeting, Jun tries his best to look interested in the discussion. He thinks of turning the phone on again several times, but he decides against it. He’s pretty restless throughout the meeting, although no one but Sho notices. When the meeting is finally done, Jun practically dashes out of the meeting room and turns on the phone.

The first thing Jun does is calling Nino.

“Hello,” Jun says the moment Nino picks it up.

“For God’s sake, J!” Nino groans. “How dare you turned off _my_ phone?!”

“I’m sorry, I was in a meeting,” Jun apologizes. He finds a corner and stops there. Tackey will be annoyed that he disappears, but he doesn’t care at the moment.

“I was on air!” Nino shoots back. “This Don’t Answer guy has called twenty times! I’m this close to smashing your phone to the wall.”

“Just ignore it.”

“How could I?! This person calls every few minutes! I’ll just block the number after this, I swear.”

“There’s no use of that, really. She’ll use a new number and start the terror again.” Jun sighs, leaning his back to the wall. He has been dealing with this for a while.

“She?” Nino’s tone changes a bit. “This freak is a she?”

“Yeah. A friend introduced me to her. She’s one of my fans, apparently. Now that she got my number, she’s obsessed in making me her boyfriend.”

“God. Report her to the police already.”

“She’s harmless,” Jun says. He doesn’t like the idea of turning his fans to the police. Moreover, this girl is Toma’s friend or Toma’s friend’s sister or something.

“Does she know that you—” Nino starts but then he stops. “Ah, yes, you go both ways.”

Jun laughs, getting what Nino is meaning to say.

“Anyway, want me to pick it up and say that I’m your ex? It might keep her away,” Nino says it so lightly, like it’s the most normal thing in the world. He’s probably just kidding but, in theory, it might actually work.

Jun freezes for a split second, and then he grins. Only Nino could make such a casual comment for such a sensitive topic like that. Jun feels his heartbeat accelerates when he answers, “Actually, just tell her that you _are_ my boyfriend. Higher chance to shut her up forever.”

Nino laughs. Jun thanks the gods that Nino laughs at that.

“Are you sure? She might tell the press, you know,” Nino says, matter-of-factly.

“I’ve never tried to hide the fact that I’m into guys anyway,” Jun says, shrugging. He knows this is not a very wise step, but this excites and spurs him.

Nino laughs. Jun laughs. Then, Nino’s laughter fades out and he asks in a serious tone, “Do you seriously want me to say that?”

“Yeah,” Jun answers before he has the chance to chicken out. “Actually, just tell that to everyone that calls. Tell them that you’re my boyfriend and that you have my phone with you for the time being. It makes more sense than the actual story, to be honest.”

“Wait— Are you for real?” Nino asks again.

“Oh, you mind?” Jun asks. He manages to sound composed while in fact, he’s worrying that Nino would say yes.

A few seconds are spent before Nino finally answers, “Well, no. Not really.”

Jun smiles. He’s relieved. “Then, please do both of us a favor by telling her that the next time she calls.”

“Okay,” Nino says.

“Alright, then. I have to go now.”

“Okay.” Nino exhales a long breath and says, “Bye.”

“Bye,” Jun replies. He ends the call and walks to the lobby. He finds Tackey there, frowning and definitely going to scold him. When they’re inside the car, Jun checks the phone once again. There are already messages from Nino.

Matsumoto: btw

Along with that, Nino has sent a screenshot of a chat thread. Apparently, Sho was messaging Jun while they’re inside the meeting room earlier, thinking that Jun was looking at his phone.

Sakurai: Stop chatting with your ex-boyfriend, Lover Boy  
Sakurai: Or, should I just drop the ex and call him your boyfriend now?  
Sakurai: [wiggling eyebrows sticker]

After that, Nino sent another message.

Matsumoto: Sakurai the Seer.

Jun doesn’t know how to interpret that, but he’s smiling from ear to ear, so he decides that it’s a good thing, after all.  


### 5

  
The number of messages that Jun exchanges with Nino in a day exceeds the number of messages in any other chat thread that Jun has. They relay notifications to one another casually now despite the initial bugging feeling of being inappropriate about it. Once a conversation is started, it naturally flows. They talk about almost everything that catches their attention. It really feels like they have never stopped talking.

After the second day ends, Jun starts to lose his urge to solve this swapped phone condition as soon as possible. He figures that he can proceed his life as per usual, with Nino’s phone with him and his phone with Nino. Not much has changed. The biggest change is that now he has to be constantly in contact with Nino, and it is not a bad thing.

Jun also feels that there is this good tension between them. Ever since he asked Nino to pretend to be his boyfriend, Nino has been joking about that frequently.

 _Won’t you call me to wish me goodnight, my dear ‘boyfriend’?_ Nino messages on the third night.

The message is followed by a series of laughing stickers, but it’s a reason enough for Jun to actually call Nino to wish him goodnight. The conversation is filled with laughter and it ends in a few minutes, but it leaves Jun with a good and excited feeling. The ‘Don’t Answer’ girl doesn’t call again, but the joke stays. Nino uses it against Jun when he deems it necessary; like when he asks Jun to walk his Pokemon GO until the eggs are hatched. “As a good pair of boyfriends, we should raise our Pokemon together,” Nino says while laughing, successfully making Jun ‘have to’ go to the convenience store at midnight just so he could walk five kilometers and hatch a Snorlax that then Nino calls _‘my baby’_.

On the fourth day, Jun gets confronted by Toma on the set.

“Matsumoto Jun, you sly,” Toma says loudly while entering the changing room.

Sho, who is also there, looks at Toma and then to Jun, interested in the commotion.

“Fumiko called me.” Toma stands right in front of Jun. “She said you have a boyfriend. What the fuck is happening?”

Sho’s eyes turn round. He sits up straight and turns his whole body to Jun. “So the ex has really become boyfriend, now?!”

“The ex?” Toma’s voice gets higher. He drags a chair to the front of Sho and Jun and starts interrogating. “Okay, what’s happening here? I need to know from A to Z about this because the last time you said you’re as single as a pringle and now you have a boyfriend which might be your ex too.”

Jun laughs because this is somehow funny for him. He didn’t count that the news that Nino is his boyfriend might reach Toma, and now Sho is believing it too. Jun could end this by telling them the truth, of course, but Jun doesn’t want to do that. Seeing both Toma and Sho like this is fun, and getting people to think that he and Nino are together again gives him pleasant feelings.

“First, I was single when I told you that,” Jun smirks. He is not lying. He was single and is single, but Toma doesn’t need to know about the details. “Second, he is my ex. Why are you so surprised about that? I’ve never told you that I’m not into guys.”

“He’s an omnivore,” Sho confirms to Toma, which Toma responds with a gaping face.

Toma needs a full minute to digest everything and to recover from his shock. He groans when he comes to and starts to complain, “Why the hell have you never told me about this?!”

“You’ve never asked,” Jun shrugs. He then smirks and teases, “What? You’d terror me yourself if you knew I was into guys?”

“You wish!” Toma barks. But then, he asks, “Terror?”

“She called me non-stop,” Jun finally tells Toma. “Ten to twenty times a day. Only stopping if I told her that I’m going to be on the plane. And after she knows that I have a boyfriend, apparently.”

“She did?! God, I knew she’s aggressive but I didn’t know she’s _that_ aggressive. Sorry for that,” Toma apologizes.

Jun waves with a chuckle, gesturing that he’s past it already.

Sho leans towards Jun. “So, now you’re back with your ex?”

Jun presses his lips together and shrugs, not giving any answer to that.

“Who is this guy, by the way? I’ve never heard anything about him,” Toma asks.

Again, Jun only shrugs. His eyes are showing that he’s having fun.

Toma and Sho start to complain and coax Jun into giving information but Jun doesn’t budge. Suddenly, Jun raises his arm to stop Toma and Sho midway because the phone is buzzing. The name ‘J’ is flashed on the screen. It’s Nino.

“Is it him?” Toma asks. He exchanges glances with Sho.

In a split second, Jun’s face turns bright with a restrained laugh. In the next split second, Toma snatches the phone and answers the call. Jun tries to stop Toma but Sho swiftly sits on him, effectively immobilizing him.

Toma puts the phone on loud speaker.

“Hello, J,” Nino’s voice comes in. Both Toma and Sho furrow their brows, confused.

“Hello, fine gentleman,” Toma replies.

“Nino—” Jun tries to shout but Sho shuts him up by covering his mouth with his hand.

“Hello? J??” Nino sounds confused and worried. No one can blame him, though. For all he knows, a stranger is answering his phone and Jun is silenced after trying to call out for him. This could be a scene straight out from a thriller movie.

“Don’t worry, your boyfriend is safe with us,” Toma says. He stares Jun straight to the eyes while smirking. “I thought your name is J? That’s what the caller ID says.”

“Who is this?” Nino refuses to answer and asks back instead. “J, what’s happening? Do I need to call the police?”

Jun tries to yell through Sho’s hand but nothing comes out but undeciphered grumbles. Sho decides to talk as well, “Whoa, whoa, calm down. We’re Jun’s friends.” Then, he amends, “We’re _J_ ’s friends.”

Nino takes three seconds before talking again. His voice is careful and calculated, probably trying to analyze the situation. “If you’re Jun’s friends, then why does he sound like that?”

“Because we’re asking about the new boyfriend and he doesn’t cooperate, so we decided that it’s better to ask the new boyfriend directly,” Toma explains.

“I’m Sakurai Sho, by the way,” Sho introduces himself. “Please don’t get mad about the next AnAn, we’re just posing.”

“And I’m Ikuta Toma. My friend’s sister’s friend is currently weeping because you told her you’re Jun’s boyfriend.”

“Oh,” Nino replies. “ _Oh_!” he repeats, sounding like he’s finally getting it. “Sakurai Sho the model and Ikuta Toma, the guy who dared to invite my boyfriend out the other day.”

“I’m a model too!” Toma complains. It’s obvious that he focuses on the fact that he’s being described differently from Sho, but Jun focuses on an entirely different thing.

The sound of Nino himself referring Jun as his boyfriend makes Jun grin under Sho’s hand.

“The model who invited my boyfriend out so late at night,” Nino points out. Now that he gets how the situation is, he no longer sounds wary.

“Oh, I didn’t know he has a curfew,” Toma laughs. “Anyway, what’s your name? We want to know to whom we should report to if our little _J_ here is being naughty.”

“Name’s Nino,” Nino answers. “Don’t worry about reporting because I’m coming there myself.”

Jun practically jumps out of his seat while shoving Sho away to take his phone. “You what?”

“Oh, hi, boyfriend,” Nino says while giggling. “I’m going to Tokyo tomorrow. Have some works to do there so I’m taking a flight there tomorrow morning.”

“Wait, he’s not in Tokyo?” Sho asks.

“I’m not,” Nino answers in place of Jun.

“Should I...,” Jun bites his lips before deciding to continue what he’s about to say, “Should I pick you up?”

“No need to. I’m going straight to work anyway,” Nino turns Jun’s offer down. “But, you’re available from 4 PM, right?”

Jun tries to recall his schedule, “I’m— Uh—”

“You are,” Nino laughs, “That’s what you schedule says.”

“Oh, God. Jun gives him his schedule? This is serious, Sho-san,” Toma comments and Jun realizes that they still have an audience.

“Jun gives me his phone, Ikuta-san. We’ve exchanged phones, that’s why you saw J instead of my name as the caller ID,” Nino says. He sounds somewhere between teasing and smug, knowing very well that this will make Toma and Sho get even more confused. “I am _that_ possessive.”

Jun laughs because Nino is anything but possessive. Nino has always been respectful to Jun and his privacy—never prying on anything even when they’re still in a real relationship. Nino believes that dating doesn’t mean giving their lives to each other, and that’s one of the many things that Jun likes about Nino.

As expected, Sho and Toma charge towards Jun with curiosity and disbelief painted obviously across their faces.

“Wait, Nino, I’ll go and get some privacy,” Jun laughs and jumps away from his two friends before escaping the changing room. He dashes to a secluded corner near the emergency exit and turns off the loud speaker. “Hey, I’m alone now.”

Nino laughs. “Your friends are funny.”

“They’re dumb.”

Nino laughs even harder.

“So, you’re coming?” Jun asks once they’re done with the laughing.

“Yes,” Nino says. “Only for a day but it should be enough to get our phones back to their rightful owners.”

“Oh, only a day?” Jun feels a little bit disappointed by that.

“Yeah,” Nino sounds like he’s smiling. “Could you... get me to the airport? It’s not like I’m asking for a return of favor or anything, but it seems like I’ll have to catch the flight too.”

Jun doesn’t see it coming, but every minute extra with Nino is something that he will not say no to at this point. “Of course,” he answers.

“So, see you tomorrow?” Nino says finally.

“See you tomorrow,” Jun replies and hangs the phone up. He leans on the wall and slides down while grinning, looking like a total love fool. Then, he gingerly types a message for Nino.

Nino: There’s a festival tomorrow.

Jun waits for the reply impatiently. After ten seconds, he types again.

Nino: I was planning to go with Toma and Sho.  
Nino: If you have time, you should come too.

Jun can not really decide if he’s going to regret mentioning Toma and Sho or not, but his adrenaline rush makes him think that it’s better than going only with the two of them. He starts to rethink the entire idea of inviting Nino, but Nino’s reply beats him.

Matsumoto: sounds nice  
Matsumoto: don’t tell them the truth yet  
Matsumoto: i wanna have some fun [laughing emoji]  
Matsumoto: see ya, my boyfriend [winking emoji]

Jun grins and goes to tell Toma and Sho that _his boyfriend_ would really like to go to the festival with them.  
 

### 6

  
Jun can not focus right on the set. His eyes keep glancing to the entrance, annoying the photographer to no end. It’s his last work for the day, and it’s also where Nino should meet him. Jun has offered to pick Nino up earlier, but it turns out that Nino will be free from work earlier than Jun, so Nino insisted that he should come to where Jun is instead.

When Nino finally appears, Jun sees him looking around and explaining himself to a staff. While talking, Nino’s eyes spot Jun and he smiles, wide and bright. He waves a bit and the staff shoots a look at Jun, confirming. Jun nods and the staff lets Nino in with an apologetic smile.

Nino leans his back on the wall, never letting Jun out of his sight. A small smile is etched on his face and Jun feels hyper aware of his look all the sudden. Jun tries extra hard this time, showing his best pose and his most flattering expression. It delights the photographer and they wrap the photo shoot up not so very long after.

“Thanks for your hard work!” Jun shouts while bowing to every direction. The staffs are replying the same and Jun talks obligatory little chat with the photographer before dashing his way to Nino.

Nino pushes his back away from the wall. His eyes are still on Jun, beaming with excitement. “You look good,” he compliments once Jun is close enough to him.

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” Jun apologizes. “Sho and Toma are in the changing room, I think. Let’s go there?”

Nino nods and follows Jun. They walk past a few staffs and Jun greets them while deliberately ignoring their questioning gazes upon seeing Nino in tow. It feels good, the entire attention that is directed to them—the unspoken questions and the speculations. It’s not that it’s uncommon for Jun to bring a friend to the set, but there’s definitely something in their gestures that makes people look at them longer with such a face.

Jun steals a glance over his shoulder and, judging by the look he has on his face, Nino is realizing what is happening and enjoying the attention too. Jun then takes a step further by stretching his hand towards Nino. He keeps his face forward while doing so, slightly bracing himself if Nino never takes the stretched hand. However, Nino does take his hand and they’re casually holding hands across the studio, gaining more attention than they are already getting.

When they enter the changing room, Jun tugs Nino closer to him by their holding hands. “Guys, Nino is here.”

There are Sho, Toma, Ohno, and Tackey in the room. All of them turn to look at Nino the moment Nino is inside. Tackey raises an eyebrow to Jun and Jun just shrugs at him. Meanwhile, Ohno and Nino look at each other and raise a finger to point at each other.

“Nino, right? From TVO?” Ohno stands up and approaches Nino.

Nino frees his hand from Jun’s and steps towards Ohno. “Oh-chan?”

Sho and Jun ask almost in unison, “ _Oh-chan_?”

Nino hugs Ohno and pats his back a few times. Once he breaks the hug, he goes back to Jun and explains, “We used to work together.”

“God, he is Jun’s boyfriend,” suddenly Toma, who is lying on the couch on the corner of the room, shouts.

“What?” Sho turns to Toma, not catching from where does the statement come from.

“Look at how he explains who Ohno-san is to Jun! God, I bet Jun is a beast when he’s jealous,” Toma exaggerates by making dramatic gestures. “Tackey, you know about this?”

Tackey shrugs, “I’ve talked to him a couple of times.” He then walks to Nino and stretches his hand, “Takizawa Hideaki, the manager. It’s nice to finally meeting you.”

Nino shakes Tackey’s hand firmly. “Nice meeting you too.”

Sho stands next to Tackey, seeming like he’s queueing to get a proper introduction with Nino too. Nino notices this and quips, “I thought you’re the famous one, Sakurai-san. Why am I the one having handshake event here?”

Everyone laughs. Sho gets his handshake anyway and Toma waves from where he is. Jun excuses himself, heading to a small screened corner where he could change into his private clothes, but Nino stops him midway.

“My phone,” Nino grins with a stretched hand.

Jun laughs. Instead of just giving Nino the phone, Jun empties his pocket and puts the content on Nino’s hand. There are Nino’s phone, Jun’s wallet, and Jun’s car key. When Nino is about to protest, Jun says, “It’s easier to change without them in the pocket.”

Nino sighs and nods, going back to the sofas while Jun gets behind the curtain. Once he’s safe from others’ eyes, Jun grins, savoring the bubbly feeling that is coursing through his veins. He listens to the sound of Nino chatting with the others, blending in right away like he always could when he’s around new people. He listens how Nino is really not intending to let the rest know that they’re not actually dating—not yet, at least. Everything makes his grin even wider and he has to actively remind himself that he’s there to change, not to eavesdrop on everyone’s conversation.

When Jun is finally out again, Nino throws him a look.

“What?” Jun asks, feeling somewhat nervous under the intense gaze.

“You name my baby???” Nino asks back, effectively making everyone stop whatever they’re doing to see where this conversation is going.

Jun is only confused for a second. Then he laughs. He laughs so hard. Nino must be referring to a Snorlax he hatched for Nino a couple of days before. “It’s _our_ baby. Since I hatched it, I’m practically the baby’s dad. And yes, I named him.”

“Hatch?” Toma voices out his confusion.

“Isn’t it... the mother who hatches the kids?” Ohno wonders, probably seriously thinking about it.

“You guys have a baby?” Sho gasps.

Tackey rolls his eyes, can not believe how these people are buying it so easily. “Okay, what’s this? Explain before Toma starts to Google if two guys can lay eggs.”

“Pokemon GO,” Nino explains the context and the rest goes ‘Oh’. He unlocks his phone and shows it to the others. “Look at the name. Can you all believe this guy?”

Sho, Toma, and Ohno swarm to take a look at the phone. “ _Kabe-don_?”

Jun laughs and tries to explain, “It’s Kabigon. You see? Kabigon. Kabe-don.”

Toma and Sho send judging looks to Jun’s direction. They retreat a few steps, clearly losing interest on the matter. Ohno, meanwhile, giggles while staring at the Snorlax.

“It looks like a wall and if it falls it goes ‘ _don_ ’, doesn’t it?” Jun tries again.

Ohno laughs out loud this time, but the rest just sigh, shaking their heads. Sho approaches Nino and places a hand on his back, as if he’s trying to give Nino emotional support.

“How could you stand him, Nino?” Toma wonders.

“Yeah, right? He’s lucky I’m in love with him,” Nino replies.

It comes out so lightly but it stops Jun’s heart nonetheless. Jun hurriedly reminds himself that it could be just Nino still playing pretend in front of Toma and the others, but the lingering gaze that Nino throws to him while saying that could mean something else too. Jun fidgets a bit, not knowing what to do with his hands and his feet and his overall expression. He must be smiling, he could feel the stretch on his face, but should he be smiling? Or should he not? What’s the proper reaction to this?

Luckily, Sho’s appetite is saving Jun. “Let’s go now. I’m hungry,” Sho stands up. He looks to his manager, “You’re coming, Satoshi kun?”

“Well, I wasn’t planning to, but—”

“Oh, come on,” Nino says, “The more the merrier, right?”

Jun then looks at his manager, “Tackey, if you—”

“I have somewhere else to be,” Tackey cuts with an apologetic smile. “Have fun,” he says and leaves the room.

“Let’s go, then?” Sho urges again. “One car? Two cars? Three? Three is too much, don’t you think?”

Jun says, “I’ll have to take Nino to the airport tonight, so—”

“Yeah, right. Airport,” Toma throws a meaningful smile. “Come on, Sho-san, let’s just take the car. Don’t ruin their plan for the night.”

“Plan? You have other plan, Jun? What— Oh!” Sho finally catches up on what Toma is thinking. He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively, “Oh, _that_ kind of plan. Of course.”

Jun, of course, understands what they’re talking about and can not prevent himself from blushing.

Sho and Toma walk out of the room first and Ohno follows behind them, stopping once to pat Nino and give him a suggestive look.

Jun dashes to gather his belongings because it’s awkward to suddenly be left alone with Nino after such conversation. He takes his bag from the couch and his wallet from Nino. “My phone?” Jun asks and Nino gives him both phone instead.

“I don’t carry a bag and we’re going to a festival,” Nino explains when Jun shoots him a look.

Jun nods and puts them all inside the bag before going around the changing room once again, making sure that they don’t leave anything behind. He drags the chair to its rightful place and picks up some garbages, determined in leaving the changing room tidy. Nino laughs at this, probably finding that Jun has really, really never changed by witnessing this habit.

“Don’t laugh,” Jun says leisurely to Nino while picking up a candy wrapper that no one knows whose. That should be the last thing that keeps them from going already. Jun straightens his body and looks around once more. Once he’s satisfied, he turns to look at Nino.

“Ready now?” Nino asks with a smile with traces of laughter. His hand is stretched towards Jun, waiting to be held.

“Yeah,” Jun mumbles and takes Nino’s hand before following Nino out from the room. He should be telling Nino that they no longer have any audience to convince there, but he decides against it.

Nino’s hand is warm and nice, after all.  
 

### 7

  
The festival is crowded, to say the least. Stalls are lining the road and people are swarming like a flood. Finding Sho, Ohno, and Toma in it is almost impossible, but they manage to do it anyway by following Sho’s Instagram updates. They meet up in front of the takoyaki stall and Sho makes a show by ordering every menu on the list.

“Isn’t this your fourth stop?” Nino asks, giggling at the way Sho’s cheeks become round by food.

“Fifth,” Sho corrects. He then offers the takoyaki to Nino, “Here, want some? They’re reaaaaally delicious.”

“No, thank you,” Nino shoves the takoyaki back to Sho.

“Oh, come on.” Sho turns to Jun, “Here, Jun. Try it. It’s super good, I swear!”

Ohno nods with his mouth full of takoyaki, gesturing that Sho is not lying about that.

Jun takes a takoyaki and turns to Nino with rounded eyes. The takoyaki is good. It has a strange flavor that resembles pudding or something but it’s good.

“See?” Sho says smugly. “Come on, give your boyfriend some.”

Jun is not particularly fond of that kind of affection in public, but the situation and the mood are kind of rooting him to do so, so he does. He takes a takoyaki from Sho and directs it to Nino’s mouth. Nino fakes a scream of rejection at first but he takes it inside his mouth anyway. He chews it, slowly and carefully, and a smile blooms on his face.

“Told you it’s good!” Sho grins.

Nino rolls his eyes and laughs. “Don’t be so confident. Everything that comes from Jun’s hand tastes good.”

Toma groans and makes a choking gesture which makes Nino laugh even louder. Seeing the chance, Jun reaches up to swipe his thumb on Nino’s corner of the mouth, cleaning a stain of sauce that he knows isn’t there. At this, Sho acts as if his eyes are burning and Toma holds his head in agony. Ohno just laughs, probably knowing that this is the exact reaction that Nino is after.

They then stroll around the festival, hopping from one food stall to another on Sho’s lead. Nino doesn’t seem to be very interested in the food and Jun makes sure Nino is eating enough by shoving his own food to Nino’s mouth. Sho and Toma are seeing this as a very lovey-dovey behavior, and Jun doesn’t mind being thought of like that.

While going through the crowd, Jun always has Nino’s hand in his. Having an excuse to pretend as boyfriends, Jun doesn’t waste the opportunity and tries to push it further one step at a time. Groggy arm around the waist, lingering touches, sweet words; all are welcomed warmly by Nino. Not only that, Nino is also actively stepping up the game. He likes to have his hand up on Jun’s cheek, pinching it lightly every once in awhile as if he couldn’t stand how cute Jun is to him. He also likes to call Jun affectionately, varying from Jun-pon to babe.

Everything goes so smoothly. By now, of course no one is suspecting that they’re not actually together. It almost feels natural—as if they are a couple of boyfriends having a date with some friends in tow. However, Jun knows full well that they are not. He is aware that by the end of the night, he will have to take Nino to the airport and say goodbye to him. There’s no guarantee that Nino will keep contacting him again after this night. There’s simply no reason for Nino to do that anymore. They are like this right now is only because Jun is stupid enough to take Nino’s phone. Now that their phones are back, there’s a high chance that they will be back to their lives before they meet in the cafe a few days back—apart and disconnected.

Jun knows he could do something about this. He knows what he’s feeling. This is not much different with what he’s feeling towards Nino back in his college days. Even though it’s only a few days since their small reunion, it doesn’t feel hasty to conclude that he is, indeed, in love again with Nino. Jun sure knows what he’s supposed to do given this fact. But, somehow, Jun doesn’t feel like he should. He feels like he doesn’t have any right to ask Nino to get back in his life. It feels like it would be asking too much, remembering how their previous relationship ends up like.

In the end, Jun decides to not think about it and just savor the moment. He decides that he will just follow Nino’s lead this time. If what Nino wants right now is to pretend as boyfriends and have fun beating up Sho, Toma, and Ohno on the festival games, then be it.

However, as the time passes by and as they drink more and more alcohol, it’s proven hard to keep his desire in check. Jun starts to notice the very detail of Nino’s face, Nino’s expression, and Nino’s body. His head starts to question on why can’t he have Nino when the person is right in front of him, holding his hand and calling him sweet names.

“What’s next?” Nino asks cheerfully, snapping Jun out of his inner battle. Nino is holding a bear that Jun wins from the shooting range. He insists that he will give it to Aiba’s daughter, but everyone is saying that it’s okay if he wants to keep it.

“Goldfish?” Ohno suggests.

Toma scoffs, “Aren’t we too old for that?”

Jun laughs. He already knows what Nino will say.

“Oh, are we, Toma?” Nino starts, already giving his wicked smile. “Or are you just... what do you call a man who’s afraid of losing, honey?”

“A coward,” Jun answers readily, restraining a laugh.

Hearing the word, both Toma and Sho get provoked. Ohno, who seems to enjoy this as much as Nino and Jun do, steps forward and offers a deal. “How about this,” he starts with his signature smile, “we have a round of two versus two match. Whichever team gets the most goldfishes gets to order the losing team around and also gets this.” Ohno shows his puffing taiyaki. It’s the last taiyaki in the whole stalls, and they have given it to Ohno because he’s the only one who doesn’t take sides.

To be honest, both Jun and Nino don’t care about the taiyaki—not as much as Sho does, at least—but their mission of the night is to beat Sho and Toma in everything, so they agree in no time, especially with the opportunity to boss Sho and Toma around for the rest of the night. Sho should have no room for more food in his stomach, but he nods excitedly anyway because alcohol keeps him hungry. And Toma, being the young, passionate man that he is, just can not turn down a challenge when he sees one.

They pay up for their scoops and start to squat around the little box filled with pretty goldfishes. Even though they are tipsy already, they are trying their best to keep their hands steady to prevent the scoops from breaking. Jun squats on Nino’s right, so close that their bodies are touching from their shoulders down to their hips. Since Nino is left handed, it makes it even easier for Jun to lean even closer to Nino’s right side. Nino worms his hand on Jun’s side, intertwining their arms and pulling Jun impossibly closer to him.

At this distance, Jun could see all the little details of Nino’s being. Nino’s hands are cute, Jun notices first. The way his fingers hook around the handle of the scoop is something that Jun never thought he would find attractive. They are stubby and look soft, but Nino’s hand in its entirety is decorated with the rough edges of a man’s that make Jun want to hold it at the same time as he wants to be held with it.

Jun is hypnotized by the way Nino moves. There’s something odd about how Nino bends his arms and flings his hands. Jun couldn’t point out what it is exactly, but there’s something different in Nino’s movements that is unnoticeable at first but alluring nonetheless. The little jumps when he’s surprised, the hunched form as he focuses on what is in front of him, the way he hides his laughter in the inside of his elbow—everything looks so beautiful in Jun’s eyes that he hopes he doesn’t need to blink so he wouldn’t miss any.

Then, there’s Nino’s face. Nino is full of expressions like always and Jun is grateful for that. He likes to see how the face contorts when Nino laughs his heart out. He loves catching the little curl on the edge of Nino’s smile when he’s thinking about something mischievous. He couldn’t take his eyes off of Nino’s eyes, which are currently gleaming with mirth, reflecting the light from the lantern above them like a pair of caramel-colored orbs. Jun remembers how he used to stare at those eyes for what it felt like forever. He remembers how those eyes were his favorite, and he realizes that they still are.

As Jun watches Nino’s eyes, he can’t help noticing that the end of Nino’s fringe almost covers his eyes. It looks like it would definitely feel soft and fluffy to the touch, the bunch of black hair. Jun feels tingles on the palm of his hand, like he wants to raise his hand to touch Nino’s face, brushing the fringe from Nino’s eyes and tucking it behind Nino’s ear. And while he thinks of having his hand there, he imagines tracing his fingers on Nino’s smooth skin, down to Nino’s mole just right under Nino’s lips; the small black dot that stands out nicely on Nino’s chin.

Jun wonders if it still tastes the same as it was years ago.

“Jun, watch— Ahhh~!” Nino shouts, waking Jun up from his trance.

Jun looks down to his scoop that is being pointed by Nino. It is broken already, having a hole that is way too big to catch any goldfish. Toma and Sho look at it too and start laughing, already blabbering at how they’re going to win.

Nino glares at them and starts catching the goldfishes again. He focuses so hard; his tongue is poking out from his lips. Jun tries to not look at it, but he fails, finding himself looking intently at the small tongue peeking from between the thin upper lip and plump lower lip. Nino notices that Jun is gazing at him, finally, and when he throws a look at Jun, questioning Jun with his eyes, a goldfish swims past his scoop and breaks it right in the middle.

“Yeaaaaaaaaahhh!” Toma cheers loudly.

“Now we only need to catch one, woohoo!” Sho joins.

Nino groans, can not believe that he’s losing and he can not do anything about it, and stares at Jun helplessly. Then, his gaze shifts to the scoops that Toma and Sho are holding and he looks at Jun again, his eyes showing mischief.

“Should we?” Nino whispers right into Jun’s ears, so close that Jun could feel Nino’s breath brushing his skin.

Jun doesn’t get it at first, but Nino looks at Sho’s and Toma’s scoops again while waving the broken scoop that he has. Jun grins when he finally gets it and nods. Then, Nino countdowns inaudibly.

_“3... 2... 1... Go!”_

Both Nino and Jun jab their broken scoops to Toma’s and Sho’s ones. With a little force, they leave holes in the scoops, preventing Toma and Sho from winning against them.

Sho’s eyes widen comically, “What the—”

Toma, who gets water splashed to his shirt when the jabbing happens, jumps up to a standing position and makes a scandalized face. He makes a dramatic shift of gaze from his shirt to Jun and Nino and starts to shout something that might or might not be profanities.

Sensing danger, Nino takes Jun’s hand and pulls him to run away from the angry Toma and Sho.

“Wait, you little cheater!” Sho yells from behind them.

Jun laughs out loud once he realizes what situation he is in. They’re running into the crowd, fueled by euphoria and adrenaline. Toma and Sho are tailing behind them, shouting and yelling. Nino keeps looking over his shoulder, grinning wide as he sees that they’re getting farther and farther from their chaser. They swiftly dodging bypassers and taking turns until they reach the deserted part of the area that is not filled with stalls. Getting tired of running, they hide inside a payphone stall, waiting for Sho and Toma to run past them.

The payphone stall is not exactly spacious. The walls are made of glass, but it’s covered by some posters of the festival so they still could hide in it. However, since the stall isn’t made to accommodate more than one person, Jun has to stand very closely to Nino in order to close the door. And since Nino has turned himself to face the door right after he gets in, now they end up being pressed to each other face to face.

They’re so close that they are almost hugging inside the payphone stall, with Jun’s hands trapping Nino’s head. Jun could feel every breath that Nino exhales landing on his cheek. He could smell Nino’s shampoo. He could feel the rise and the fall of Nino’s chest because it’s pressed against his own. He could almost swear that he feels Nino’s heartbeats as well.

Being in this situation, Jun starts to forget that they are being chased. He starts to forget the festival. He forgets Sho and Toma. He forgets Ohno. He forgets the world. All he knows is that Nino is right there, in front of him. Flawless, so close, and breathing against him. He could not register whether Sho and Toma have already run past them or not, but he could register how many times Nino has blinked since they got into the small space. He registers how warm Nino’s body is and how close Nino’s face is to his. He also realizes that Nino’s lips are a bit chapped. And close. So, so close. Extremely close that if he ducks down a bit, they would be kissing.

So Jun does.

The first contact is soft and nostalgic, with Nino’s soft gasp accompanying it. The second contact is more of a question—an inquiry of permission. The third is initiated by Nino and it becomes fierce in a heartbeat. Nino swings his arms around Jun’s neck and pulls Jun closer, as if he has waited for this for too long and he has run out of patience.

When they break the kiss apart, they are panting and out of breath, but it’s no longer because of all the running that they just did.

“I have postponed my flight to tomorrow morning,” Nino says in between his breaths. “I saw a hotel—”

“My place is just fifteen minutes driving from here,” Jun cuts, clearly showing that he’s against taking Nino to some random love hotels when he can bring him home instead. “You okay with that?”

Nino nods and connects their lips once again.

### 8

  
Jun finds himself pinned against the door by Nino right after they enter Jun’s apartment. Nino attacks him fiercely, nipping and biting and sucking on his lips while gripping Jun’s wrists in his hands. Jun answers with the same level of eagerness. He angles his head so he could coax Nino’s lips open and intrudes Nino’s mouth with his tongue, battling his way in because Nino is competitive like that.

Nino tugs Jun’s shirt up and discards it completely when Jun gives way by parting their kiss. Nino’s eyes are bleary, looking right into Jun’s eyes with want and desire reflected in it. Jun kisses him again, deep and messy, and pushes Nino forward, further into the apartment. Nino loses his jacket and also his shirt on the way, and Jun starts unbuckling his belt without seeing.

Nino’s back of the knees hit the edge of Jun’s bed and Jun pushes him until he falls on his back. Jun gets rid of his jeans and Nino does the same too while scooting further to the bed. Nino is faster by a few seconds and he tugs Jun down with him by pulling on Jun’s arm, making Jun lose his balance and fall on top of him. Nino giggles at this, not minding the weight and the impact at all, and starts kissing Jun again.

Jun smiles to the kiss, enjoying that Nino is as eager and as playful as he remembers he was. He then moves his kisses down to Nino’s jaw and neck, delighted by the grunts and groans that he gets from that. Nino’s fingers are intertwining with Jun’s locks of hair now, tugging it lightly every time Jun does the right thing. Jun laps on the dip of Nino’s clavicle and leaves a bruising mark there, earning a laugh and a slap across his head from Nino.

“Jun—” Nino warns when Jun keeps moving down, breathing hot air to Nino’s nipple. His laughter disappears in an instant, replaced by a short gasp.

Jun smirks to that, knowing that Nino’s nipples are sensitive even though Nino would never admit it. He continues by licking Nino’s nipple once and blowing air on it right after that. Nino writhes and starts to scramble for purchase, clawing on the sheet and on Jun’s shoulder, especially when Jun proceeds to suck on the nipple and bite it a few times while pinching the other nipple with his fingers. Nino lets out a moan when Jun rolls his hips, creating a friction down where they want it the most, and it spurs Jun to move with more determination and precision.

After a few minutes of this, Jun is suddenly being pulled by a great force and they roll on the bed, resulting in a change of position. Now that he’s not busy teasing Nino, Jun could see Nino’s face again and he marvels at how clouded with lust Nino’s eyes have become. Nino looks down at him like a predator looking at his prey. His chest is heaving up and down visibly and his skin is red from arousal.

Nino lunges down and attacks Jun’s jaws. He has both of Jun’s arms pinned above Jun’s head and the sheer force that he uses to keep them there turns Jun on even more. With his tongue, Nino traces Jun’s sharp jaw diligently. Unlike Jun, he goes upward instead. He stops once he reaches Jun’s ear and puts extra attention there.

Jun whips his head to get away from Nino’s tongue, but his restrained arms make it harder for him to do so. He writhes and moans, feeling shivers down to his spines. His ears are his weakness and Nino seems to be happy about it, because Jun could feel Nino’s smile on his ear, wide and smug. Nino gives him no reprieve, keeping on licking and biting Jun’s earlobe sensually.

Knowing that he’s pretty much under Nino’s mercy like this, Jun decides to give up on trying to escape and join the game instead. He starts rolling his hips again, which is immediately appreciated with Nino’s low grunt right into his ear. He circles his legs around Nino’s waist, pulling Nino’s lower body down with him and extracting a long moan from Nino’s mouth as their sexes are being rubbed against each other. Jun thrusts his hips upwards once, and then twice, and Nino’s grips are loosening on the third, giving Jun the chance to grip on Nino and turn their position once again.

They’re on the very edge of the bed now, thanks to all the rolling that they did. They both are flushing and panting, staring at each other like they’re trying very hard to not lose it and pounce on each other raw. Jun sits up on his knees and bends over to get the lube and the condom from the bedside drawer. He tosses the lube on the bed and holds up the condom, throwing a question without really voicing it out.

“You,” Nino answers, clearly understands what Jun is asking.

Jun grins and tears the foil packet with his teeth. While he’s rolling the condom on, Nino uncaps the lube and pours a dollop to his hand. Nino starts to stroke himself with his own lubed hands, slowly and sensually, definitely putting up a show for Jun to see. Jun, who doesn’t waste any more time and gets the lube on his hand also, watches Nino intently like a good audience that he is. His eyes follow the up and down motion while his hands warm the lube in autopilot.

Nino laughs, yanking Jun out of his trance. “Come here,” he says hoarsely and takes one of Jun’s hand by the wrist. With his other hand, Nino pulls Jun down by the nape of the neck for another deep kiss. He navigates Jun’s hand down, down, and down until Jun could feel the ring of muscle with the tip of his fingers.

Jun gets the hint and starts to make a circling movement with his fingers, pushing slightly to loosen the tight entrance. Nino pushes Jun’s finger in with a push from his wrist and he moans right into Jun’s mouth. Jun relaxes his hand and keeps his finger rigid. He lets Nino do whatever he wants with Jun’s hand, which are easing it in and out a few times and making a circular motion before adding another one of Jun’s finger in. Jun scissors his way deeper into Nino and Nino bites Jun’s lip as a retaliation, groaning delightfully at the intrusion.

The next moment, Jun’s fingers are extracted from inside Nino and they are rolling again, to the opposite direction this time. Nino braces himself on Jun’s shoulders and descends down slowly, guiding Jun inside him with one hand. Jun closes his eyes because the feeling is overwhelming him. When he opens his eyes again, Nino’s face is still contorted from the penetration but he’s already moving his hips slowly in experimental sways.

Jun grips on Nino’s hips, steadying him and helping him making a nice rhythm that they both can enjoy. He thrusts up every once in awhile, making Nino gasp and groan at how deep he gets. Jun shifts his hips until he finds the perfect angle which makes Nino’s eyes roll and nails dig deeper into Jun’s shoulders.

Nino leans further and further as he picks up the pace. His movements turn into shallow jerks that resemble a wave of spasms. He starts to lose the rhythm and his arms are shaking. Nino is close, Jun could tell very well. He is losing his focus and going to tip over soon enough, but Jun doesn’t want that yet.

“Come on, Nino,” Jun grips Nino’s arm. He thrusts hard upward and Nino loses his hold completely, falling forward on top of Jun. Nino buries his face on the crook of Jun’s neck and squeezes Jun’s name out of his throat in sync with his up and down movements.

Jun groans because hearing Nino calling out his name like that arouses him more. He grips Nino’s body and turns them both over so he’s on top of Nino once again. Nino hooks his legs around Jun’s waist and plants his nails on Jun’s shoulders, pulling Jun down to a feverish kiss. Jun reciprocates the kiss and starts driving himself into Nino at a slower pace but with greater force. He goes deep, making Nino break the kiss and growl at the impact. The creakings of the bed beneath them, their combined grunts, and the voices of skin against skin make a harmony that Jun could listen forever.

Nino reaches down to pump on himself, feeling that the friction he gets is not enough. Jun reaches down too, wrapping his hand around Nino’s to increase the pressure. He guides Nino’s hand that is failing to make a steady rhythm, determining in bringing Nino to his orgasm.

Not so long after, Nino keens and spasms under Jun’s body, spurting his release in between his and Jun’s bodies. His whole body goes taut. His back arches and his neck stretches prettily. His breath stops. His moan drags out beautifully. Nino’s insides clench and the combination of everything brings Jun to his own orgasm.

Jun falls on top of Nino after he’s coming down from the bliss. They both just lie there, trying to chase their breaths. Jun, who is still oversensitized, flinches when Nino moves in order to get more comfortable. They end up hugging with Nino still underneath Jun, and it’s only after a long while that Jun starts to get bothered by the stickiness.

Jun plans to go take a shower and clean Nino afterward. He moves to untangle himself from Nino, but Nino stops him with a soft grip.

“Stay,” Nino says, not even bothering to open his eyes.

“You don’t want to clean up?” Jun giggles, amused by what Nino is doing.

Nino moves a bit so his face is nestled on Jun’s shoulder. He hugs Jun tighter, restraining Jun from moving away. Then, he says, “I don’t want you to get up.”

Jun smiles. He knows it’s silly, but he feels warm all over. Surrendering, he whispers through his own grin and right to Nino’s ears, “Okay.”  


### 9

  
Jun wakes up alone. If it’s not for the messy state that he’s in, he would have thought that he was just dreaming. Nino has left when Jun was still asleep and he left no traces at all. There’s no notes or anything. He has taken his phone from Jun’s bag too and it’s the right one this time.

Jun sighs happily remembering the night before. He has never dreamed of being able to hold Nino in that way again. Now that he did, it confirms that he couldn’t—and shouldn’t—let Nino go from his life again. He still loves Nino, even after all this time, and Nino is worth to fight for, even if it means that he has to overcome his mistakes from the past.

Jun takes his phone from his bag and unlocks it, failing twice before succeeding because he’s too used with inputting Nino’s passcode. He gets a message from Sho with a photo of a certain payphone stall attached and even though the photo is dark, he could figure out who are the two guys kissing inside the stall. The posters didn’t do a great job in hiding what’s insight, after all.

Jun laughs and checks for any messages from Nino, which is none. He wonders at what time Nino boarded the plane, or if he has boarded at all. Jun tries his luck by calling Nino’s number—feeling funny that he no longer has to dial in his own number—and finds that it’s unreachable. Jun takes it as a sign that Nino is still on his way, so he decides to get up and take a shower, trying to clear his head up since he’s about to make a big decision that he couldn’t mess up.

After he finishes his shower, Jun fixes himself a sandwich for breakfast and turns the TV on. He checks his schedule and receives a call from Tackey that tells him that he’s going to pick him up in an hour. Jun then asks Tackey if he could have a day free this weekend and practically begs for it, and Tackey says that he would try if he could do something to free up his schedule for a day.

Jun smiles contently. A day is all he needs. He’d fly to Osaka, find Nino, and finally do the right thing, which is coming clean to Nino and asking him to be a part of his life again. He knows that there’s a probability that Nino will get mad at him after he’s telling the truth, but it’s still worth the shot. He might come home happy or heartbroken, but there will be no more regret clinging to his heart.

When Tackey arrives, he comes with the news that he managed to free up Sunday for Jun. He throws a questioning look and Jun answers it shortly with Nino’s name, trusting that Tackey will understand the situation. Tackey only nods to that and they go to Jun’s first location of the day. Jun is lucky that he’s going solo in this one, which means that he is saved from Toma’s and Sho’s endless teasing that he knows he’s about to receive.

While he’s getting his hair done, Jun tries to call Nino again. The number still can not be reached and Jun furrows his forehead, finding it strange. Even if Nino just gets on the plane when he first tried to call him, he would have been arrived by now. Jun checks his watch again and does the calculation in his head, making sure that his initial calculation is right. It is right, and Jun couldn’t help but having a huge question mark in his head, but he brushes it off by thinking that Nino might be going straight to work and ran out of battery. He was on a business trip, after all, there must be a lot of things that he has to do the moment he arrives at work.

Still, Jun leaves a message for Nino so Nino would message him back once his phone is on.

Matsumoto: Nino, have you arrived?  
Matsumoto: Let me know when I can call you. [smiling emoji]

Jun puts his phone down and smiles, knowing that he’ll feel better by doing so. He tries to focus on his job after that, but he still finds himself checking the clock every now and then, making Tackey ask if he’s waiting for something. Jun says no to that and Tackey warns him to focus before he gets another complaint from the photographer like the last time. Jun slaps himself internally upon that, hating himself for failing in being professional two times in a row.

The job is done within two hours and Jun immediately rushes to check his phone after he greets everyone. There’s still no message from Nino. The number is still unreachable and Jun can not dismiss the bad feeling that is creeping up his spine now. His brain starts to make scenarios of what is happening. His mind wanders to the thought that he already had before, but has been pushed away after they spent the night together.

What if Nino doesn’t want to talk to him anymore? What if the end of their swapped phones case also marks the end of their communication? What if everything that happened between them in the last few days is just a one-time thing—a stunt that Nino pulls because the situation is fitting to just do so? What if it’s just another way of having fun for Nino? What if it doesn’t mean more than a silly act, if it means anything at all?

Jun has been prepared for this, to be honest. He has accepted that there’s a possibility that Nino wouldn’t want to have anything to do with him anymore after everything is resolved, since their only reason to keep in contact would disappear after that. He has braced himself for that. Actually, that’s the only scenario that he had in mind until last night.

But then, things happened between them. Jun wants to believe that something between them has sparked last night—that they still have a connection, a desire to be together. He believes that every touch and every kiss mean something, something that is definitely not Nino intending to leave him completely without words.

Failing to calm himself down, Jun calls Aiba, the next best way he knows in reaching for Nino.

“Yes?” Aiba answers. Clattering voices are in the background, showing that probably Aiba is working in his restaurant right now.

“Aiba,” Jun breathes out, getting a little bit calmer because at least Aiba is picking up. “Has Nino arrived?” he asks.

“Oh, yes. He has, he has,” Aiba answers, a bit distracted. “He texted me earlier. He’s having a day off, he said.”

“He texted you?” Jun asks, starting to feel really bad about this.

“Yeah, he sent me a message through LINE,” Aiba confirms. “What’s up?”

“I... can’t reach his number. I sent him messages on LINE too but he hasn’t read it.”

“Oh, that’s weird,” Aiba sounds concerned. “Did something happen? He doesn’t usually ignore messages.”

“I’m not... sure,” Jun says truthfully. Well, some things happened for sure, but he is not sure if any of those could lead to this.

“Well, probably he’s—” Aiba is cut by a person talking to him in a loud and hurried voice. “I’m sorry, MatsuJun, it’s kind of hectic here now. I’ll talk to you again later, okay?”

Before Jun could say anything, the connection is already terminated by Aiba. Jun sighs, throwing his head back to the back of the sofa. His feet tap the floor in a fast pace, showing his restlessness. He tries to think of what to do, but his head is a mess because of the panic that starts forming.

“What did you do?” Tackey breaks the silence by asking.

Jun whips his head to Tackey’s direction, not realizing that his manager has entered the changing room while he’s calling Aiba. He wants to talk to Tackey, but he gets an idea so he postpones the talking and asks instead, “Where’s your phone?”

Tackey takes out his phone and gives it to Jun, a confused expression on his face.

Jun dials Nino’s number with Tackey’s phone. It connects. He dials the same number with his phone. It’s unreachable. He tries dialing the number with Tackey’s phone once again and it still connects.

Jun gives Tackey’s phone back and slumps on the sofa. The realization hits him so bad. It also explains why his LINE messages are left unread.

“Nino blocks me,” Jun declares, feeling all hopes dissipating to the thin air.

Tackey furrows his brows. “Why?”

“I don’t know,” Jun massages his temple, everything is confusing and it’s giving him a headache.

“Did you... do something wrong last night? Did you break up or something?” Tackey asks carefully.

Jun sighs, remembering that Tackey thinks they’re dating for real. He swings an arm to close his eyes and starts spilling the beans, telling the truth to Tackey from how he swapped their phones out of an impulse to how they end up pretending to be boyfriends. Tackey is definitely not amused by the story and he makes sure Jun knows he thinks that everything that Jun did is stupid.

“Everything went smoothly. To me, at least,” Jun sighs when he reaches the end of his confession. “I mean— After all the things that we’ve done together, does it make sense that he suddenly wants to disappear from me?”

“And what is it actually that you’ve done together? Playing around? Making fool out of everyone?” Tackey snaps. “Listen, Jun, swapping phones is your first mistake, but not the biggest. Your biggest mistake is to _pretend_ ,” Tackey stresses the last two words strongly. “Look now, are you sure everything went smoothly? Are you really sure? Or is it just a part of the pretend?”

“We slept together, Tackey, do you really think a pretend would go that far?” Jun explodes.

“It wouldn’t, but it builds the perfect atmosphere,” Tackey points out.

Jun couldn’t reply to that and he starts reconsidering everything. It is stupid to play pretend when he has a real feeling towards Nino. But, was it all really entirely just a pretend for Nino? Jun hopes it’s not.

Tackey sighs and lowers his tone. “But still, though, it’s weird that he blocks you all of the sudden. Are you sure you didn’t do anything wrong?”

“I can’t remember doing anything wrong. I mean, he still looked pretty happy last night, right before we fell asleep.” Jun opens the LINE app again, checking if Nino finally reads it. He frowns when he finds that his messages are still unread and he idly scrolls through their previous conversation. Nothing is amiss.

Tackey exhales a long breath. “So is this why you want a day off?”

Jun smiles bitterly. “Actually, I wanted to confess or something. But then, I can’t even contact him now.” Jun closes the conversation because it starts to look like it’s mocking him. He scrolls through the chat list instead and finds that a few of his friends has left him messages since he left his phone with Nino. Nino has told him about this, but he hasn’t checked them so he starts opening them one by one, starting from the newest one.

“Just go there and talk to him. Stop all the pretend—”

“Wait,” Jun jumps on his seat, stretching an arm to stop Tackey. He has a chat window opened from a friend from college, someone who he doesn’t even remember the face. It’s dated today, around 2 AM. It has been marked as read, so Nino must have opened it before he left.

The message it contains makes everything make sense.

Izumi: I heard you’re with Nino now  
Izumi: isn’t that the freak back from college?  
Izumi: the one you dated for a dare?  
Izumi: lol what about that?  
Izumi: another stupid dare?  
 

### 10

  
When Aiba doesn’t pick up his calls too, Jun knows that words have traveled. He knows the only way he could make things right is by flying to Osaka and tell the truth about everything, but, unfortunately, his responsibility holds his back. He has to wait for two days before his schedule allows him to fly to Osaka and it’s killing him to not be able to do anything in the meantime.

When Tackey gives him a clear sign on Saturday evening, Jun doesn’t waste any time and goes directly to the airport. He books the first flight he could board on and arrives in Osaka in about an hour. He has no idea where he could find Nino, but he remembers the name of Aiba’s restaurant and finding the location is not that hard with the help of internet. He goes there and the restaurant is packed with guests.

“Aiba,” Jun calls out when he reaches the counter.

Aiba spares a glance to Jun and hardens his expression. He ignores Jun completely after that, making sure that Jun knows he’s not welcomed. He doesn’t offer Jun a seat or anything. He acts as if Jun is not there at all.

Jun sits right in front of the counter. He wants to get Aiba’s attention, but he couldn’t think of any way that wouldn’t make a fuss that might make the guests uncomfortable. He checks the clock and decides to just wait there until everyone is out. The restaurant is closing in an hour anyway.

Aiba’s wife thinks that Jun is a regular customer, so she asks what he would have but Aiba pulls her away from Jun and tells her to just ignore Jun as well.The wife looks confused but Aiba doesn’t budge when she asks about it, so she just throws an apologetic smile to Aiba and continues serving the other guests. Getting an obvious rejection like this makes Jun doubt if he’s going to make it, but he stays anyway.

Once the restaurant is empty from the guests, Jun makes his move again. He approaches Aiba who is cleaning the counter.

“Aiba,” Jun starts. “Aiba, listen to me.”

Aiba’s wife sees this and pats her husband’s shoulder before leaving them alone. Aiba might not say anything to her, but she understands that they need time to be alone.

Jun nods a bit to the wife, expressing his gratitude, and moves closer to Aiba who keeps wiping the counter clean.

“I know how it sounds like, but I swear, it’s nothing like that,” Jun says.

Aiba keeps ignoring Jun. He flinches when Jun moves closer to him and swats Jun’s hand away when Jun tries to grab him. Jun understands very well that Aiba is angry too at him—and he has the right to be—but Aiba is his best bet to get to Nino, so he stands his ground. Aiba deserves the explanation too, anyway.

“I can explain about what Nino read—”

Aiba finally stops wiping and looks at Jun straight on the eyes. There’s anger in Aiba’s kind eyes. “You want to say that it’s a misunderstanding? A lie? That there’s never any dare? Save your breath because I will never believe that.”

“That’s not what I was about to say,” Jun grabs Aiba’s arm. “There was a dare, but I really loved him. I still do!”

“Oh, do you, really?” Aiba snaps. “Didn’t you laugh with your friends after that? Talking about how silly Nino’s face is when he said yes or something? About how stupid we were for believing that you loved him for real?”

“Aiba, that’s not—”

“How could you, Jun? I thought you’re a nice person. I sincerely thought of you like that. You talked to us even when people call us names. You hanged out with us. When I heard that you confessed to Nino, I was very happy to see you both together. Even when you guys broke up, we both still thought that you’re a great person. We had no idea that you’re laughing at us with your jerk friends behind us.”

“That’s not it!” Jun groans in frustration. He knows explaining this wouldn’t be easy, but being faced with those words just ruins him. To have both Aiba and Nino doubt him is not a thing that he looks forward to. They both have always been dear to Jun, since they are two of the most sincere people that Jun have ever had the privilege to be friends with. “Listen, I was drunk, okay? I didn’t remember a thing, and when I woke up, the man that I love so much is calling me his boyfriend.”

“You could have told him after that!” Aiba points out

“And risking to lose him?” Jun makes a point by asking the question to Aiba. He sighs, knowing full well that it is his biggest mistake. “I admit that it’s a wrong thing to do, but I was afraid that if I told him, he’d be angry and I’d lose him forever. I mean, look at us now. This is the exact result that I was afraid of.”

Aiba stares at Jun’s eyes, assessing if he could believe in Jun this time.

“Masaki, believe me. Do you really think that I fake everything? Our friendships, our times together, the fun we had and the laughter, just for the sake of a goddamn dare?”

“It all could have been some sort of prank for all I know. You could have been laughing at us for it too; two freaks thinking that they could be friends with the popular guy.”

Jun feels his heart break upon hearing that. It doesn’t feel so good to be doubted by a friend he truly cares. “Do you really think of me like that?” Jun croaks.

Aiba closes his mouth at that. He is still staring at Jun, his eyes showing that he’s having an inner battle with himself. “Why should I believe in you?” he asks finally.

Jun wants to ask ‘ _why shouldn’t you?_ ’ but he’s aware that there are more reasons for Aiba to not believe him at this point. He has been lying for years to both of them, after all, it’s just natural to lose faith in him. He takes a long breath and exhales it before saying, “There’s absolutely no reason for me to call you the other day other than that I wanted to see you again. And Nino too, because I knew you’d invite him. I know I had the worst kind of friends during college, but I’ve always thought of you guys as my _best_ friends. More than them. That’s why I called you when I haven’t even once called them after college.”

Aiba observes Jun’s eyes for a few seconds more and then he closes his eyes. The tension slowly leaves his body as he exhales a long breath. His defense is crumbling. He’s giving in.

“I... honestly couldn’t believe it when Nino first told me, but it’s Nino who said that,” Aiba says, explaining himself. “It’s been rough for him. I just... don’t want to see him in a mess like this.” Aiba sighs and pours a glass of drink. He slides the glass to Jun and finally sits down. “All of this, if it’s true—”

“It is,” Jun reaffirms.

“It would be easier to accept if Nino heard it from you, not from some LINE messages that he read by chance,” Aiba says. “He has been through a lot, knowing this through this way just shatters everything for him.” Aiba opens a can of beer and sips it. “He thought it was because of him that the relationship didn’t work. He didn’t say a word but I know he’s blaming himself when you guys broke up. He was so, so happy when I told him that I was meeting you, and it took a lot of coaxing before he gave in and came along. He thought you wouldn’t be very happy to see him again.”

“I am more than happy to see him again.”

“But he had no idea,” Aiba points out. “Then, the whole mixed up phones happened and he grinned all the time, telling me how silly you were and such,” Aiba smiled a bit. “He turned into a teenager in love and it’s almost disgusting, but he’s happy so I thought all is good. He went to Tokyo with a smile on his face. He even joked that he would take the wrong phone deliberately just so you need to keep calling him every day.” Aiba frowns. “But then he came home with this news. Could you imagine how broken his heart must have been?”

Jun looks down to his glass. He knows he screwed up big time. He should have been telling everything to Nino when he has the chance, not playing pretend and fooling around instead. Now that everything is too late, he couldn’t blame Nino for hating him to the guts. “I’m sorry,” he mumbles.

Aiba sighs again and takes a paper from the drawer. He scribbles something and gives it to Jun. “Tell that to him. You owe him that,” Aiba says.

Jun reads the writing on the paper. It’s an address.

“I believe you,” Aiba lets Jun know. “But if he doesn’t, then I can’t do anything about that. So go see him and make him believe in you.”

Jun’s heart races. Aiba believes him and has given him the opportunity to explain everything to Nino. His body trembles in happiness. Even having a chance is already a luxury for him at this point.

“Thank you, Masaki,” Jun squeezes out the words as he stands up, taking the paper with him and walking backward towards the door.

“Go,” Aiba says and Jun runs to where Nino is.  
 

### 11

  
As soon as Nino sees who is knocking at his door so late at night, he freezes on his spot and throws an incredulous look at the uninvited guest. It’s already close to midnight and there Jun is, standing in front of Nino’s door with his guilty eyes. Jun expects that Nino would slam the door right in front of his face or tell him to go, but Nino steps aside instead and lets him in.

Jun steps in unsurely, knowing that he’s not in the position to get this kind of peaceful treatment. Nino closes the door and takes brisk steps to the sofa and clears some items from there before gesturing to Jun to sit there. Nino himself opts to stay standing up, leaning on the dining table across the room. From the expression that he has on his face, Jun knows that Nino is angry.

“Speak,” Nino says after a few seconds of silence. He has his arms folded in front of his chest and he stares at Jun with a pointed glare.

Jun stands up because the distance between them is too big for his comfort. “Nino, I—”

“Don’t get closer,” Nino says fiercely. “Say what you need to say but don’t get closer.”

Jun stops. He stays on where he is but he doesn’t go back to sitting position. “Nino, I’m sorry,” he says with all the sincerity that he has. “I should have told you about the dare but, believe me, the relationship that we had was not a part of the dare. I did confess to you because of the dare—because I was too drunk and I didn’t know what I was doing—but I stayed in the relationship because I really loved you. I love you! I still do!”

Nino doesn’t say anything. He just looks at Jun with the same pointed glare. He stays completely still, like he’s waiting for Jun to finish.

“I’m sorry that I was a coward,” Jun continues. “I’m sorry that I didn’t stand up for you and Aiba when my jerk friends make fun of the both of you. I’m sorry that I didn’t have the guts to ask you out without being drunk and dared first. I’m _really_ sorry that I also was not brave enough to tell you about the dare while we’re dating because I was afraid that you’d leave me. I’m sorry that I ruined our relationship. It kills me, knowing that I hid something from you. It kills me so much, that in the end you left me anyway. It was never you. It was always me. Me being stupid and me being a coward.”

Nino still presses his lips together, not giving any response, making Jun feel like he’s being judged, like what he’s doing is pointless. Jun stutters because he’s beginning to lose focus on what he’s about to say. He stammers, getting nervous at Nino’s lack of response.

“I know my friends were a bunch of jerks. They— they make fun of you and such. But, I swear, what we had is real. It’s not something that I did just to make fun of you or anything. I—”

Nino sighs and finally opens his mouth. “Aiba might make it sounds like it, but the bullying and the making fun of us are not the things that I have a problem with,” he says, sounding calm enough, but the hint of anger is still there. “It’s just another kind of prank, another kind of bullying. I am used with that. Even if you really did confess to me because you thought it would be funny, I’d not have much problem with that. In that case, you’d just be another bully, another unimportant someone that makes things a little bit harder for me.”

“But I—”

“Shut up, I’m not done yet,” Nino glares at Jun, giving him a warning. He continues, “My problem is that you’re lying to me. My problem is that when I asked you to end our relationship, when I thought it didn’t work out because there was something unfitting about us being together, you didn’t correct me and told me the truth. You just said yes instead. You let me go.”

Jun can not utter anything. Now it’s his turn to be the one staring while standing still.

“Years, Matsumoto. Years have passed and you have never said a thing to me. In all of those years, I thought that maybe I was in the wrong. I thought that maybe you didn’t love me or maybe the love faded out because of something that I did. I thought that we’re a failure—two people that aren’t meant to be together. I thought we’re a lost cause. I thought we’re just not meant to be.”

Nino takes a breath. His hand is shaking when he does the hand gesture while he’s talking and his eyes are red and glassy of anger. “But then I learned the truth. There was nothing wrong with us. You’re lying when you said that yes, we’d better off as friends. You’re lying when I asked you if you’re changed because you’re uncomfortable with the relationship. You picked to keep your silence rather than fighting for our relationship. You had the options and you. _Chose_. To. End. Us.”

Jun is stunned by the words. Everything is true but he has never thought about it in that way before. Having it being put in words like this makes Jun feel terrible. He knows that he’s at fault, but this is a whole new level of wrong. He didn’t realize that he was choosing to lie over trying to keep the relationship. All he had in mind when that happened was that he couldn’t bring himself to say the truth to Nino and that the guilt he had in him made it hard to keep the relationship going. Seeing it in a new light like this makes him feel terribly stupid to ever agree on breaking up with Nino.

Jun feels his heart fall to his feet. He swallows the lump in his throat and forces his voice to come out. “I’m sorry, Nino,” he says.

“Sorry doesn’t change anything,” Nino snorts. He pushes himself away from the dining table and walks to the door, opening it. “I think our conversation is done now.”

Jun almost walks out of the apartment in defeat. _Almost_. He feels so stupid and wrong that he feels unworthy to be there—that it’s just natural for him to get lost. But, luckily, his brain catches up soon enough. If he accepts his defeat and walks out of the apartment and from Nino’s life, then he will only repeat his mistake all over again. He will choose to easily give up on their relationship again. He will once more become a coward and lie to Nino about his feeling.

Jun doesn’t want that. He has done enough mistakes already. So he stands his ground and says, “No, it’s not.”

Nino turns to look at Jun at that, clearly taken aback because he is not expecting that.

“Because even though I ruined our past relationship by being a dumb fool that I was, I’m not going to ruin our _current_ relationship by doing the same,” Jun states.

Nino scoffs, “There’s no current relationship between us.”

“And that’s you lying to me,” Jun points out. “To us.” Jun walks to Nino and closes the door. He looks into Nino’s eyes and asks, “Now tell me without lying, did you really feel nothing between us the past few days? Is everything that we did—the touches and the conversations and everything—just purely pretend?”

Nino doesn’t answer. His eyes are fixated to Jun with a bit of surprise reflected on it.

“Tell me, Nino, will you not be heartbroken if I were to walk away from that door when you told me so?”

Nino’s eyes start to become glassy, probably because Jun is agitating him in the ways that he has never encountered before.

Jun grips Nino’s shoulders and shakes him, “Tell me, do you not love me now? Answer yes to all of my questions without lying, Nino, and I’ll walk away.”

Nino swats Jun’s hands and pushes Jun away from him. He opens the door once again and shouts, “Get out!”

“Answer me!” Jun demands. He’s not going to give up on this.

“YES!” Nino yells especially loud. He grips Jun’s arm and shoves him through the door. He pushes Jun with all of his strength until Jun loses his balance and hit the hallway’s wall and closes the door before Jun could prevent it.

Jun knocks on the door desperately. He doesn’t care if it’s past midnight and if he’s going to be reported by the neighbors. He isn’t done talking with Nino yet.

“Nino, answer me!” Jun yells through the door.

There’s no answer from Nino. Jun is not even sure if Nino is still listening to him. He pounds on the door several times more and realizes that he’s doing it in vain. He finally stops, losing his hope. He slides down to kneel on the floor, his forehead and fists still attached to the door.

Jun decides that yelling will not give him anything, so he stops doing it. He then talks instead, deciding in pouring out everything that he wants to say even though he’s not sure if Nino is listening. “I was planning to ask you to start all over again,” he starts, remembering the day when he met Nino and Aiba in the cafe. “Just before I knew you found out about the dare, I planned to fly here today and come clean to you so we can try again with a clean slate.” Jun turns around and rests his back on the door. “I wanted to confess everything. So I guess, I’m going to do it now anyway.”

The silence that Jun gets as a return is not encouraging but he is determined to keep on. The chilly air of the night bites to his skin but he could feel nothing but the ache in his heart.

“First, I want to confess about the actual reason why I started to talk to you during college. It wasn’t because I needed to know more about the book you were reading. It’s because I couldn’t take my eyes off of you and it had been weeks and I couldn’t stand it anymore.”

Jun closes his eyes. It’s easier to pretend that Nino is listening to him when he closes his eyes.

“Second, if it’s not because of the dare, I might never have the courage to confess to you, so I am somehow grateful that I had some fuckers that dared me to do that as friends.”

Jun smiles a bit. He remembers how mixed up his feelings were when he realized that he had confessed to Nino.

“Third, I cried myself to sleep after we broke up. I didn’t catch a cold a day after that. I skipped classes because my eyes were swollen and I didn’t want anyone to see it.”

Jun had never admitted this to anyone. He had never admitted that he has ever cried after he’s 15. He even tried to convince himself that he was _not_ crying that time. It was just the allergy, he told himself right then. Allergy of being very sad.

“I thought of contacting you when we’re apart but, again, I didn’t have the guts to do so. I stalked you through SNS and I felt wrong about it but I kept doing it anyway.”

Jun remembered that one time when he found out that Nino was dating someone else. It was a very unpleasant experience that stopped him from excessively following every single update of Nino online.

“I bought the book. The one you were reading when we first talked.”

Jun still had the book by his bed. He has never read it because he doesn’t like the book, he is just very fond of the memory it brings.

“I got really excited when we’re pretending to be boyfriends.”

Jun smiles bitterly.

“I didn’t have any plan to go to the festival with Sho and Toma. I just wanted to spend more time with you.”

Jun stops. Somehow, it feels more painful to admit all the things that are recent. It should be a happy thing. It should be something that they both laugh on together. Saying it out loud to no one like this underlines the fact that, after this, it all would mean nothing at all.

“And I... took your phone instead of mine is not by mistake. I took it on purpose. I wanted to have a reason to talk to you again.” Jun bites his lips. He starts to feel like this is the end. “I—” Jun swallows, finding it hard to continue talking. He stands up, facing the door once again. There are still a lot more that Jun wants to say to Nino, but he feels like it’s useless now. Nino has closed the door on him. Nino has shut him out of his life and there’s nothing more he could do. Jun wants to keep on trying but it seems useless when Nino blocks him away like this.

Still, Jun tries once again. “I—”

The door is suddenly opened, revealing Nino who has glassy eyes, red face, and a crumbling frown on his face.

“What kind of stupid person takes the wrong phone rather than striking up a conversation on LINE or something?”

Jun is baffled for a few seconds. He didn’t expect a question like this when he saw Nino opening the door again. Then, he smiles because Nino opening the door means that a chance is opening up for him.

“Apparently, this kind of stupid person,” Jun answers.

“Okay, listen,” Nino inhales sharply. “I have questions for you.”

Jun stares at Nino with eyes full of hope. Whatever question that Nino has at this point, he is ready to answer it.

“Is there anything else that you’re hiding from me? Another dare or anything?”

“No,” Jun answers readily.

“Do you genuinely consider Aiba as your friend?”

This is out of the topic but Jun answers anyway, “Yes.”

“The pretend in front of Sho and Toma, do they really not know a thing or is it another prank that you’re pulling on me?”

“They still think that we’re boyfriends.”

“Do you really, _really_ think that you’re in love with me? Even now?”

“Yes.”

Nino takes a deep breath and then exhales it. “Last question,” he stares at Jun, “Are you okay to start over with a hypocrite that bitched the hell out of you for lying and then lied to you the second after? Because I definitely lied to you when I answered ‘yes’ earlier.”

Jun almost couldn’t believe his ears. He grins so wide that his jaws are aching and he swears his heart is doing some kind of acrobat moves in his chest. It takes him a moment before he could find his voice to answer, and when he finally answers, he does it right in front of Nino’s face.

“I’m more than okay with that,” Jun spells out and seals it with a kiss on Nino’s lips.


End file.
